Perhaps Introspection Will Pay Off This Time

I have no doubt that I will slip into an old habit, or just don’t feel like keeping up with a hard won truth, and I’ll have to go through the whole process again. I’m deliberately not reading through the archives to see if I’ve had these particular revelations before.

Aggravations

I hate checking email.
Why?

• I get in trouble at work.
• I’m overwhelmed by all the junk mail.
• I don’t want to deal with any more AMF shit.
• Microsoft Outlook develops issues at home and doesn’t want to run right.
• There’s too much of it and no time to answer the ones I want to answer.
• I feel obligated and then guilty because I can keep up the obligations.

Real annoyance or minor nuisance?

• Mild annoyance except when I give into the avoidance strategy.

What can be done about it?

• Set a schedule and a time limit to check email. Before leaving for work but after at least one daily MIT, lunch time for personal Gmail, and when I get home before winding down for the day.
• Always delete the junk mail folder at the end of the day, everyday. Do not let it build up for a few months.
• Switch the website emails to filter through a Gmail account before coming into Outlook to cut down on the amount of junk mail.
• Once during the weekend, take thirty minutes and perform a task on the Reconfiguring Outlook project list or read through the DWL folder.
• Try this for the next month (May 18) before switching to another program.

I hate oversleeping.
Why?

• Throws off the whole day, and puts me in a foul mood.
• I usually don’t get to writing or exercising.

Real annoyance or minor nuisance?

• Minor nuisance.

What can be done about it?

• No caffeine after noon! And keep morning caffeine to under two cans, averaging one a day.
• Go to bed and get up at the same time everyday.
• Write regardless. Exercise can be moved to the afternoon when I get home.
• Set up a bedtime routine and stick to it.
• Turn the bedtime alarm clock back on.

I hate the commute.
Why?

• I get sleepy in the car.
• It’s time I could be spending doing something else.
• The price of gas and wear and tear on my car.
• Possibility of accidents goes up because I’m on the road so much.

Real annoyance or minor nuisance?

• Major nuisance.

What can be done about it?

• Be sure I’m awake fully before driving.
• Drive more carefully.
• Buy the cheapest gas I can find.

I hate having a dirty kitchen that expands to the rest of the house.
Why?

• Mess just multiplies and you can’t ever stay ahead of it.
• I’m not poor white trash that lives in a sty!
• I waste time in cleaning frenzies that could be spent on other things.

Real annoyance or minor nuisance?

• Nuisance

What can be done about it?

• Follow the chore schedule that works beautifully.
• Stop taking housekeeping so seriously. It’s not bad until it’s a health hazard.

I hate feeling obligated.
Why?

• Because I must fulfill my obligations before I Can do anything for myself.

Real annoyance or minor nuisance?

• Annoyance

What can be done about it?

• Start saying no or quantify time promises and stop feeling guilty about it!
• Explore this feeling more.

I hate having no time to write.
Why?

• If I can’t write, why live?
• Writing should always come first and I can’t be selfish and put it first.
• I’m not a writer is I don’t write.
• Everything has to be done and I’m the only one here to do it.
• Writing only serves me.
• Until I get paid, it’s only a hobby. And I don’t deserve hobbies that cost money and time.
• I go foamy at the mouth if I don’t get to write.

Real annoyance or minor nuisance?

• Major annoyance and wondering what the hell is wrong with me.

What can be done about it?

• Quit other obligations.
• Make writing time one of the daily MITs.
• Get my fucking priorities straight.

I hate running out of money every month and racking up overdraft fees.
Why?

• I’m a fucking financial ruin until I get it straight.
• The credit union has taken enough of my money that could have paid some of my debts off, or added to savings and not bounce payments anymore.

Real annoyance or minor nuisance?

• Major annoyance.

What can be done about it?

• Follow the budget.
• Save money so I can live on last month’s income.
• Stop beating myself up when I fall down.

I hate doing all the work on AMF.
Why?

• No one is really communicating with me anymore.
• I’m being used by just about everyone (and having it pointed out by impartial bystanders).
• People are going to make me the fall guy.
• I don’t know who to trust anymore.
• It’s not my dream, and it’s stealing time to work on my dreams.

Real annoyance or minor nuisance?

• Major annoyance.

What can be done about it?

• QUIT!

I hate hiding stuff because I don’t want to upset people.
Why?

• I get stressed because I don’t want to upset people.
• I feel like I’m living a lie.
• I don’t want to be hated, so I avoid telling people anything.

Real annoyance or minor nuisance?

• Major nuisance, it’s a personal quirk effecting everything.

What can be done about it?

• Stop avoiding what makes me uncomfortable.

I hate hurting people.
Why?

• I shouldn’t press myself onto people.
• I’m tired of dealing with people, just leave me alone.
• I’m going to hurt them with what I’m asking for or what I have to tell them.
• They’re going to hate me.

Real annoyance or minor nuisance?

• Major nuisance, it’s a personal quirk effecting everything.

What can be done about it?

• Stop avoiding what makes me uncomfortable.

I hate my bathroom.
Why?

• No shower.
• No sink.
• No real storage.
• Ugly sheetrock walls painted a hideous color.

Real annoyance or minor nuisance?

• Annoyance

What can be done about it?

• Remodel.

I hate being afraid.
Why?

• Honestly, I don’t know why I’m afraid of people hating me, being obligated to people, giving people bad news.

Real annoyance or minor nuisance?

• Nuisance.

What can be done about it?

• Stop avoiding things that make me uncomfortable.

I hate wasting time on the Internet.
Why?

• It’s time I could be spending on writing or anything else.
• Bad for my health. I should sit in front of the computer for hours.

Real annoyance or minor nuisance?

• Major nuisance.

What can be done about it?

• Set time limits on Internet reading.
• Write first then play.
• Schedule get up breaks.

I hate having no free time.
Why?

• I can never be spontaneous.
• I always feel guilty about taking time off. I have too much to do.

Real annoyance or minor nuisance?

• Annoyance.

What can be done about it?

• Recognize that I need free time every day and every week to stay healthy and sane.
• Schedule the obligations and the free time and keep the schedule.
• Get together with people once a month for dinner or an event.

I hate not sticking to any resolutions I make for myself.
Why?

• It means I’m a failure. I have so much to fix and I just stop trying to fix anything.

Real annoyance or minor nuisance?

• Major nuiscance.

What can be done about it?

• Stop trying to fix everything that’s wrong at once.
• Concentrate on fixing one thing in a three month period instead of a month. Evidently, a month is not long enough to force a new habit.

I hate having to depend on the undependable.
Why?

• Because it means I have to do everything.

Real annoyance or minor nuisance?

• Annoyance.

What can be done about it?

• QUIT depending on them.

I hate school.
Why?

• Financial stress.
• Loops I had no idea about jumping through with the school and Sallie Mae.
• This class is making me spend extra time on AMF and that stresses me out.
• I can’t find time to handle school business so I can graduate.

Real annoyance or minor nuisance?

• Annoyance.

What can be done about it?

• Stop avoiding what has to be done.
• Make deadlines for the paper project.

Once that list was done, I pulled fifteen strategies to relief the stress out of it.

Strategies to Relieve Stress

1. Set deadlines for projects.
2. Use weekly Big Rocks and daily MITs.
3. Set a daily schedule for chores, email, and other things that pile up quickly.
4. No extra caffeine, and no late nights.
5. Write every morning for at least thirty minutes.
6. Use the bedtime alarm clock and set up a bedtime routine.
7. Use the chore checklist.
8. Start telling people no or be honest with what free time I have.
9. Quit AMF.
10. Follow the budget.
11. Stop beating myself up when I fall down.
12. Stop avoiding what makes me uncomfortable.
13. Set time limits on Internet reading and schedule get up breaks.
14. Concentrate on fixing one thing in a three-month period instead of a month. April – June is to fix writing priority.
15. Exercise on schedule. No skipping

Some are easier accomplished than others. Then I started scheduling. It was like doing a mind sweep and a calender at the same time. Then I transferred that list to the calender. Next I’ll need to update the chores checklist and SimpleGTD. I’m undecided whether to keep Joe’s Goals or not. I’m not very good at keeping it updated, and most of what I have to do will be established by Big Rocks and daily MITs.

It doesn’t sound like I’m concentrating on just one thing for the next three months, but really everything that is scheduled is writing related. My goal is to get my writing back into priority level one in my life. I’m optomistic that this hard look at my life will help me do that.

Read Free!
The BookWorm