Monday, November 26, 2012

Hiatus Over

Thanksgiving is over. And the break between it and Christmas is probably the worst time to reestablish my groove, but I need to find balance again so my brain stops feeling like it must bounce around like a kangaroo on speed.

I'm prickly and grumpy and attempting not to take it out on anyone, which only fuels the itch to go find a punching bag and hit it. Violence, my default setting. That I'm pushing forward with changes is the true culprit and what the inner Beast wants to shred. Maybe I gave it too many changes today.

  • Monday yoga routine
  • New bra that I thought fit but it pokes me in the arm just like all the rest
  • New purse that is a Christmas present but is fraying my last nerve because I can't keep it on my shoulder
  • And I'm still annoyed that I left $20 worth of books I bought for me at my sister's in Texas!

*Inhale* Okay, admitting that has eased off the desire to claw at something. But it sucks that my first post in so long is bitchy and whiny.

  • Despite not exercising, eating too much, and not measuring, I only gained three pounds since the last time I weight back in August.
  • I finally found a website that explains why underwire bras stab me in the arm: I have a petite torso.
  • I spent quality time with my family, especially my nephew.
  • My coworkers told me how to fix my purse issue, so I can continue to use it without aggravation.
  • My shoulder pain is finally clearing up enough to work out again.
  • I worked out!

So why the hiatus? When I last posted I was attempting therapy with the Inner Committee on the whole fear of success issue. The therapy fell apart followed by the daily scheduled. Enough chores were avoided to cause a cascade effect on my life, which led to kangaroo brain on speed. Basically while I scrambled to keep up, I didn't want to blog about what a worthless failure I am. And the Inner Committee got off the hook and successfully avoided therapy for over a month.

I need to start it again because I had to be closing in on something uncomfortable for such an extreme reaction. Some time soon.

Read Free!
The BookWorm

2 comments:

Sharp said...

I guess all I can say is "Good Luck!" I've found that I'm most successful making major changes only one or two at a time.

Of course, everybody's got advice, and I'm sure you're tired of it. So, I won't lean into it. ^_^

KLCtheBookWorm said...

I've already decided to recast 2013 as the year I give myself less goals to do.

But this, aside from new clothing issues, is more a get back on the horse I have rode before. Life rolls along merrily when I mark off 80-90% of what I should do daily, and I have to remind myself of that every time I slack off.