Closing Open Tabs

What Anonymous Doctor says hearted a million times:

I do not feel that it is reactionary or even inaccurate to describe an unwanted, non-indicated transvaginal ultrasound as “rape”. If I insert ANY object into ANY orifice without informed consent, it is rape. And coercion of any kind negates consent, informed or otherwise.

In all of the discussion and all of the outrage and all of the Doonesbury comics, I find it interesting that we physicians are relatively silent.

After all, it’s our hands that will supposedly be used to insert medical equipment (tools of HEALING, for the sake of all that is good and holy) into the vaginas of coerced women.

Fellow physicians, once again we are being used as tools to screw people over. This time, it’s the politicians who want to use us to implement their morally reprehensible legislation. They want to use our ultrasound machines to invade women’s bodies, and they want our hands to be at the controls. Coerced and invaded women, you have a problem with that? Blame us evil doctors. We are such deliciously silent scapegoats.

Where Is the Physician Outrage? Written by An Anonymous Doctor and originally published on Whatever (http://whatever.scalzi.com).

The Doonesbury strips referenced in "Where Is the Physician Outrage?"

Michael Bay vs. Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles controversy: I ran across one theory that Michael Bay said he's making the Turtles aliens to deliberately rile the fandom up. Because what came up after that infamous remark was a comment that the ooze is alien. But you know what, the damage has been done. The awful stuff in Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen insulted me (a white, non-Transformer fan woman), so I don't want Michael Bay anywhere near my green teens. Then to use my worry about a universe I adore and have accepted many mutations of by various license holders to stir up publicity? Oh hell no, you ain't get any of my money.

Because of all that and that I am a rabid fan of both franchises, this Gutters page made me giggle a lot.

Project Rooftop highlighted a redesign of the Turtles cast that kicks some shell!

Bully will be released un-rated, since the MPAA is being dicks about language used by actual teens. But male bums and full-frontal female nudity are fine for PG-13 movies. *Rolls eyes* From the trailer, I feel this is a movie that all of America needs to watch.



In full disclosure, I was alienated and had no school friends until I changed school districts for my sixth grade year. My online handle is my reclaiming the word that was constantly thrown in my face as an insult. And now what kids face is so much more worse and physical.

And my baby sister is engaged! We're all very excited and happy, even though the wedding itself is over a year away. Now that my neck is back to normal, I need to get back into exercising so I can shed the extra weight I'm carrying.

Okay, that's everything, I hope. Now I have to get back to outlining Forget the Sun and what the paying job actually pays me for. :p

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The links cover a whole spectrum

First up, a situation that pisses me off. Jim C. Hines covers it much more coherently than I can right now in his post Doonesbury and Rape.

Second, Kate and Rick: a Love Story is a review that so eloquently explains why I squee so much at Castle and refuse to miss an episode if I can help it.

Third, 1920's Batman design. What really amuses me is how many costumes really don't change that much.

Fourth, Neil Gaiman found my engagement ring while he was looking for a replacement TARDIS pin. Too bad I don't have a fiance to give it to me.

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It's March Already

Yeah, the end of February flew by me. But being sick is a good reason to miss the end of the month, I suppose. I got back to the paying job February 28th to a March 1st deadline for the Tax and Company Licensing divisions. February 29th, still rushed and I woke up with a stuffed up nose and got nothing written around all my appointments. That night I kept waking up every hour sweaty, but achy and chilled and burrowing under all my blankets. March 1st, I dragged my ass to the paying job still feeling achy and chilled but we had a deadline. I bought a thermometer when I finally got off the paying job and turns out I was running a fever. I stayed home March 2nd and the fever finally broke that day. I spent the rest of the weekend recuperating.

Today was the first day back at the paying job since getting sick, since I took Monday and Tuesday off ages ago to drive Uncle Scott to his appointments. It wasn't bad like last week, but still had to get back into the paying job groove.

Fun stuff: Gotham 1459

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Least I Could Do Moment of Truth

LICD is their annual Valentine's Date contest, and the winner this year is Tyler, a SCA member. Today's episode nearly made me snort diet soda out my nose.

Today's my last day of work. Tonight I'll be driving to Austin. Saturday Sherwood Forest Faire! SQUEE! I'll be back home Monday and back to the normal routine Tuesday.

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The Shining Analysis

This is a topic that has been keeping me distracted while at work. It came up in my newsfeeds that someone made a documentary of the theories surrounding Stanley Kubrick's the Shining called Room 237. It's been a while since I saw the film and what I remember of it as a whole was "not the novel at all but SCARY with a dash of significance." Hey it is Stanley Kubrick apparently he didn't know how to film without "significance" all over the place. And I was now curious as to what film analysis people had come up with and went Googling.

Bill Blakemore The Family of Man This is one of the first ones to come up in the search, explaining in broad strokes the whole subtext regarding Native Americans. The Exploding Kinetoscope's essay "Dad, Do You Feel Bad?" The Secret History Lesson of the SHINING expands on the first essay with screenshots to illustrate.

Physical Cosmologies: The Shining (excerpt) part one is a bit harder to get through, reminding me of all the reasons why I evade literary analysis. But ultimately, the writer made some good points about mirrors being doorways to the realm of the ghosts and Danny luring crazy Jack to his death on purpose. That second part really impressed me, since my initial viewing I always thought this kid was clever to get away from him and was just plain lucky with the blizzard.

Then io9 posted Watch this Insane Breakdown of Stanley Kubrick's Hidden Narrative in the Shining, so I did. Then I clicked on Rob Ager's other YouTube videos analyzing the movie before finally ending up at his site Collective Learning. Here's the direct link to his in-depth analysis: "MAZES, MIRRORS, DECEPTION AND DENIAL". Good news is he has done analysis on more movies than just the Shining, bad news is he wants you to buy his DVDs to get all of it. He is upfront with what is available for free on his website is about 50%.

And in the someone is being very cute file: The Overlook Hotel article that blends fictional facts with behind-the-scenes facts. My only issue with it is that the writer tried to match Kubrick and King's depictions in the same article. It may have been easier to just pick one.

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January's Done

The past two weeks have been off, so it's time to climb back on track. To start, see what I accomplished this month and set my boulders for February.

January Boulders

• Take measurements Jan 1
• Self-assessment for exercise
• Research for Imbolic (Feb. 2)
• Start reading 365 Goddess
• Spending diary from Dec. 20 - Jan. 20
• Finish "Stellar Gift of Death"
• Update my NetWorthIQ badge

Monetary Concerns
I finished the spending diary boulder for January, caught up Chase Student Loan payments, took and out a new loan to pay off Republic Finance so they wouldn't sue me.

February Boulders

• Finish taxes on Feb. 19th
• Have a budget for Sherwood Faire trip before Feb. 15th
• Update the NetworthIQ badges for Dec. and Jan.

Not on the same level as the boulders, I have budget exercises on the Big Rocks list that I need to do:

• Set up Zero-based spreadsheets for 2012
• Create a five-year financial plan

Take health seriously

I completed the January Boulders of taking my body measurements and self-assessment for exercising. But as soon as I started adding daily exercise into my schedule, I got the bad news stress courtesy of Republic Finance, and my upper back seized up in response to the point where turning my head brought tears to my eyes. So exercises is on hold until my back is fixed.

February Boulders

• Find the best time of week to update FitDay.com

Spirituality Practice

The idea behind reading 365 Goddesses was to follow the suggestions for celebrating each goddess. That hasn't worked out in the morning scramble to get ready and I stopped reading it. I also didn't do anything for Imbolc.

Add to Pebbles

• Read 365 Goddesses

February Boulders

• Research Ostara
• Make a new Book of Shadows

Fiction Writing

I haven't finished the first read-through of Forget the Sun and I feel like I'm stuck in Stellar Gift of Death.

February Boulders

• Finish Stellar Gift of Death
• Finish Forget the Sun's read-through and move to step two.

DIYLife featured a "snapshot of my life" that I liked enough, I decided to answer it like a meme.

Snapshot of My Life Version

Actual age: 35 years minus 20 days.

Age I feel: Present. Except for more physical aches and pains, I don't think the interior has changed all that much. I matured early.

How I look: Forever getting carded.

Marital status: Single and happy with it, much to my mother's consternation.

Short term goals: They're on my This Week I Need to Do list, and I'll spare you since most of them are above.

Long term goals: Remodel my house or at least get a new roof on it. Publish my original fiction. Travel more.

What’s worked recently: Sticking to my checklist for the day.

Things I’m trying: Breaking goals down by the month seems to be working.

Thoughts on Life: One shouldn't read a story about a cooking show when one is hungry.

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Bad News, Invitations, Punishments, and Insights

Now I’m at a safe place to look back at last week. The week was cruising along, had worked in an exercise routine into my schedule, needed to work in more progress on my writing and editing, two appointments one for the doctor on Thursday and with the CCFairy on Friday. I got invited to a Pampered Chef party and was considering going. So far my next paycheck forecasted a surplus that I should save for my birthday trip and emergency fund, but I could spare $20 on the microwave rice cooked that I’ve had on my wish list for a long time.

Go home Wednesday night and find out that one of my creditors wants to sue me in small claims court over the remaining balance and my inability to pay it. Okay, fine, I still don’t have the money. Also amused by the irony of the amount that is so out of my reach right now only qualifies as worthy of small claims court’s time. I’m ticked off at the marshal who handed my private papers to my parents. I have a meeting with the CCFairy on Friday and hopefully we can get this settled without undue hardship on me.

After that, the second invitation came through Facebook: a free women’s safety seminar for 6pm next Thursday. And my first thought is: “Can’t go! Can’t got ot Pampered Chef either! YOU CAN’T GO!” in the most seething, angry inner voice I have. If it could have separated from my body to beat me up, it would have. As it was, it knocked me back enough from my worries to ask “what the hell?”

The projected surplus hadn’t changed, because it won’t make a dent in what I owe to the creditor. But immediately my mindset is I’m a bad rotten person who should be locked up at home to not get in trouble with money. Brain points out that it’s not free because I would have to eat and spend gas to get to the seminar. I don’t deserve money spent on me. Come straight home and don’t do anything.

That night I went to bed thinking this was my coping mechanism to avoid temptation. I woke up Thursday to a muscle knot where the stress always goes and the idea that I’m grounding myself because I need to be punished over my bad with money. “What the hell” has now become “why do I do this to myself?”

Thursday, I got confirmation that I had maintained my current health even with going off my meds for a few months. I’m back on them and wondering if I should go back off them again. :p

Friday, CCFairy swooped in with an emergency loan to cover the other and kick the judgment off me credit report. I signed up for the credit union’s credit counseling service so I can’t make any financial moves without talking them over with the CCFairy. No arguments from me, since that was my goal at the beginning of the year. I did bring up the punishment insight and admitted I have no idea what to do with it.

I still don’t, but I’m leaning towards accepting the invitations. I double checked my next paycheck forecast and I think I can afford to go to both and not reach the point of can’t pay a bill. That’s where I am today, minus the running around I have to do to actually pay the creditor off. And my mouth is a little sore still since I got the new bridge put in Saturday.

This week: I need to stop typing up blog posts and work on my fiction. ;) I also have to squeeze in sewing time at home. Yeah, I finally feel like sewing again. :D

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Hot Bod 2012 Post 2

So I had a week and now I need to report progress. I exercised Monday, Tuesday, and Wednesday. I used the rest option on Thursday because I woke up with a knot in my left deltoids muscles that made it painful to turn my neck and it is still present today. Friday through Sunday I skipped, mostly to avoid more pain from the knot.

So Monday I’m going to get back in the yoga groove and make an appointment to see a massage therapist this week because the self remedies I’ve been trying haven’t alleviated the symptoms.

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Random links

Good writing advice sent my way:

Just Make the Bed: Overcoming the Problem of Writers Resolutions

Terrible Minds: 25 Things Writers Should Stop Doing

A Word to the Writerly Wise

SOPA & PIPA

WWdN: In Exile: Today the US Senate Is Considering Legislation That Would Destroy the Free and Open Internet

Making Light: SOPA and PIPA. Where We Are. What They Want.

Money & Living Hacks:

Get Rich Slowly: Make 2012 Better By Asking the Right Question. This has future budget post written all over it.

Lifehacker: How to Book a $1700 Vacation for $700 by Volunteering This is the first time I've ran across this idea, but I'm intrigued. Vacations have been off my radar for so long as well as charitable giving.

A Food Triage Box Granted, I haven't been wasting as much food lately because I haven't been buying any, but I have ran into this problem before. I think a box of need to be eaten soon would work in my fridge.

Apartment Therapy: How to Clean Your House in 20 Minutes for 30 Days I like the break down of surface cleaning and deep cleaning, but don't know how it would work with the schedule I already have.

Enjoy!

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After I swore I was never going to give that man any more money

I’m shilling for George Lucas. After swearing never to give the man any more money, he finally gets “Red Tails” out in theaters Jan. 20th. He is the producer and has been trying to do this movie about the WWII heroes the Tuskegee Airmen for 35 years. Hollywood has been, well, Hollywood about it: i.e. majority black cast, nobody will pay to see it. Cuba Gooding Jr. and Terrence Howard both star in it and people besides Lucas wrote the screenplay and directed it. This is a WWII action movie like “Band of Brothers” and “Saving Private Ryan”, so support it for the Greatest Generation and to prove the studio heads wrong.

Movie Mom: Red Tails Interviews

Due to the way my paycheck falls, I'll have to see it the weekend after it opens. But I will see it in the theaters. I hope you will too.

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P.S. SOPA protest: I've sent emails to my senators and will be sending more emails to my representatives once I get home.

Hot Bod 2012 Post 1

It’s so cliché to make a New Year’s resolution to lose weight or get into shape, I’m almost embarrassed to declare this goal that it may be mistaken for the same thing. But my embarrassment doesn’t change the fact that my body can’t do all I ask it to do and I don’t want to hurt when I do it.

So the first step is to see how bad the damage is. I found a three-column journal that never helped me master my finances, but gives me lots of room to record weekly measurements.

Jan. 15, 2012
Height = 158.12 cm
Weight = 197 lbs
Neck = 38.1 cm
Shoulders = 121.7 cm
Bust = 121 cm
Waist = 112 cm
Abdomen = 115.6 cm
Hips = 121.7 cm
Thigh = 65.8 cm
Knee = 40.2 cm
Calf = 40.5 cm
Ankle = 22.5 cm
Upper arm = 31.3 cm
Forearm = 25.7 cm
Wrist = 15.6 cm

Fit Day result = BMI = 36.03 Obese

Step two: Make daily exercise a part of my routine. Primal Blueprint Fitness concentrates on moving slowly, lifting heavy things, and one day of sprinting a week. Since my flexibility has gone to crap, I’ll do yoga on the move slowly days: Monday, Wednesday, Thursday, and Saturday.

Tuesday and Friday are the lift heavy things days concentrating on five body weight movements: push-up, pull-up, squat, overhead press, and plank. Today I need to assess myself to see what my maximums are to calculate which level to start the exercises at.

Set back already. I had bought an Iron Gym Express in 2012 when I found it on clearance since my attempt at building a pull-up bar on the front porch flopped. Plus I wouldn’t use it when it got cold. So one that you can set up in a doorway seemed like a good investment. Today, I put it together to do the pull-up assessment and found that my doorways are too wide for it to fit. *headdesk*

All is not loss because they packed in a Cardio Jump ropeless jump rope. Jump ropes have been my enemy since elementary school. This lets me jump without something to tie my ankles together.

Assessment Outcome
Push-up = 3 start with Wall Push
Pull-up = 0 and have nothing to do them on
Full Squat = 15 start with Wall Squat
Shoulder Press Push-up = 5 start with Elevated Jack Knife Press
Forearm/Feet Plank = 74 sec. start with Hand/Feet Plank Level 3 (90 sec.)
Forearm/Feet Side Plank = 25 sec. start with Hand/Feet Side Plank Level 1 (45 sec.)

That takes care of the lifting days; what about yoga days? I like my yoga DVD, but I’m not ready for its routine. Luckily, I kept my notes of poses to help my problem areas: hip openers, core strengtheners, chest openers, and weight loss.

Always start with Sun Salutations. Even if I have no time for anything else, that is better than no exercise. Wow, it actually works out. I have four days for yoga and four problem areas.

Mondays
Sun Salutations x 2
Hip Opening Routine

• Butterfly
• Left Leg Pigeon
• Left Leg Head to Knee
• Left Leg Happy Baby
• Double Pigeon
• Butterfly
• Right Leg Pigeon
• Right Leg Head to Knee
• Right Leg Happy Baby
• Double Pigeon

Child
Corpse

Wednesday s
Sun Salutations x 2
Core Strengthening Routine

• Mula Bandha 30 lifts x 3
• Find TA
• Happy Baby x 3
• Toe Taps x 4 each foot
• Bridge Pose x 2
• Dolphin Pose
• Dolphin Plank Pose
• Locust Pose
• Downward Dog
• Left Foot Low Lunge
• Right Foot Low Lunge
• Handstand Prep

Child
Corpse

Thursdays
Sun Salutations x 2
Chest Opening Routine

• Cobra
• Boat
• Downward Dog
• Right Leg Pigeon
• Downward Dog
• Left Leg Pigeon
• Downward Dog
• Fish
• Bridge
• Table
• Cat/Cow Breathing

Child
Corpse

Saturdays
Sun Salutations x 2
Weight Loss Routine

• Hero
• Camel
• Child
• Rabbit
• Child
• Half Shoulder Stand
• Plow
• Bridge
• Table
• Right Foot High Lunge
• Right Foot Warrior 1
• Downward Dog
• Left Foot High Lunge
• Left Foot Warrior 1
• Downward Dog
• Mountain
• Five Pointed Star
• Right Foot Warrior 2
• Five Pointed Star
• Left Foot Warrior 2
• Five Pointed Star
• Right Foot Triangle
• Five Pointed Star
• Left Foot Triangle
• Five Pointed Star
• Mountain
• Right Leg Tree
• Mountain
• Left Leg Tree
• Mountain

Child
Corpse

Yoga is blance, hence my reminders to do both legs. Yes, I have forgotten before. Overall, I feel good about these routines. Let’s see what happens next week.

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Geaux Tigers!

I can't have the TV on and get any work done, so its WWL and all the BCS talk. I want my state to win, evenif I'm not much of a football fan.

But I am a Better Than Ezra fan and they released Death Valley EP. The band started while they were students at LSU and they noticed that most of the fight songs hadn't been updated since they were first written, so they modernized the songs. Enjoy!





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Something a little bit lighter

I'm taking a break between planning. I've got the big stuff done, now it's onto boring stuff like the grocery shopping list. Boring, but necessary. So something that made me *giggle!SNORT*

The Bloggess has started watching Doctor Who

Okay, back to getting stuff done.

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Goals for 2012

Lessons learned from 2011’s Goals: I need to find my doable point before I can stretch beyond that. While I like the yearly plan and will keep it, I’m going to break it down to what I can accomplish in a month. Carrying the metaphor of Big Rocks, the monthly goals are my Boulders, things to finish in a week are the Big Rocks, and daily chores become the Pebbles. I’m also crossing fingers and hoping that the monthly focus will change some things into daily habits.

The big topics this year: Monetary concerns, taking health seriously, spirituality practice, incorporating writing into my life more fully, and getting non-anxious over submissions.

Monetary Concerns

• Specific: Follow the budget set up by the CC Fairy.
• Measurable: Update Quicken every day.
• Action-oriented: Do the exercise assigned by the CC Fairy. Due on January 20th: a spending diary and reports on my spending habits.
• Realistic: Prioritize spending:
  1. Food
  2. Gasoline
  3. Utilities
  4. Mortgage
  5. Chase Student Loan
  6. Family Loans
  7. All other loans
• Trackable: Update NetWorthIQ badge every month.
  • Update the zero-balance budget spreadsheet each month.

Take health seriously

• Specific: Follow Primal guidelines on food and exercise
• Measurable: Weigh every morning
  • Take body measurements once-a-week
• Action-oriented: Exercise every day.
• Realistic: Lose 4 pounds by next check-up with Dr. Miller
• Trackable: Keep a food diary and measurements at FitDay.com
  • Fill out the workout log book every day I exercise and show progress at Joe's Goals

Spirituality Practice

• Specific: Carve out sacred space in my house where I can store the tools and conduct rituals.
• Measurable: Read 365 Goddess.
• Action-oriented: Create a new Book of Shadows
• Realistic: Celebrate the Sabbats.
• Trackable: Journal exercises and Sabbat rituals in the Book of Shadows.

Fiction Writing

• Specific: Finish Stellar Gift of Death
  • Edit “Words of Parting”
  • Edit “Blue Man on the Porch”
  • World building for the steampunk mystery
  • World building for Piper of Shadows universe
  • World building for Zy’s universe
  • Edit Forget the Sun for Mez’s 2012 project.
  • Write 2000 words a week and pick out a new project once Stellar is finished.
• Measurable: Post the weekly total at DUF using the Writertopia progress bar.
• Action-oriented: Dedicate at least 30 minutes on a writing project every day.
• Realistic: Write what I feel like I can’t not write.
• Trackable: Each story has a marathon tracker of its own, and metrics are posted every day at DUF.

Submitting more stories

• Specific: Submit to three markets.
• Measurable: Enter submissions into Sonar 3
• Action-oriented: Look for 12 markets.
• Realistic: Look for email markets.
• Trackable: Note how anxious I am about the submission in Sonar3.

So now to break down to what Boulders I want to do in January.

January Boulders

• Due on January 20th: a spending diary and reports on my spending habits.
• Start reading 365 Goddess
• Research for Imbolc celebrations on Feb. 2
• Self-assessment for exercising.
• Take measurements on Jan. 1st
• Finish Stellar Gift of Death

Changes to make on my Pebbles list:

• Write 15 minutes x 2
• Exercise every day and track what is done
• Update Quicken every day

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Results For My Lofty 2011 Goals

How do I think I did with all the SMART goals I outlined for this year? Truthfully, I don’t see any progress on all the fronts I tried to attack. Some I ignored completely, which carried over to how I ignored writing this post over the holiday break. My willpower petered out for doing anything on my list and I ended up watching BBC series of Lord Peter Wimsey mysteries made in the 70’s (and 90% accurate to the books).

Let’s see what I managed to accomplish.

Show progress on paying off debt load

• Specific: Follow budget every month. I tried, but picking myself up when I fell off the rails proved to be a barrier. I’m too close, I want to take care of the here and now annoyance, and usually go off the rails due to frustration. 2012 tweak: The next exercise the Credit Counselor and I will do is to set up a budget I can live on and make headway with. I’m hoping it’ll trigger I’m-getting-graded-for-this behavior in me.
• Measurable: Update Quicken every day. Now this I think I have finally beat. As long as I don’t go over 15 minutes a day, I haven’t shoved it aside as the dreaded chore and let it build up until I have no idea what’s going on. 2012 tweak: Maintain this progress.
• Action-oriented: Find a part-time job to increase income. We all know how well that went. First, I helped Mom with housework for my grandfather until the S.O.B. did something that Dad put his foot down about and got us fired. I was surprised by how long it lasted. Second, the sales job with no demos that I quit in November. At least I did get my parents a vacation out of that. 2012 tweak: As mentioned above, I’m seeing a credit counselor to find a new plan for tackling my debt and budgeting issues. I’m going to be referring to her a lot so she is now dubbed the CC Fairy. I also put in an application but I don’t expect anything to come of it.
  • Bring all bills current by Jan. 28, 2011. I got them current and now they’re not current. It’s a merry-go-round chase. 2012 tweak: Girls Just Want To Have Funds: Four Reasons to Stop Scrambling To Feed Your Creditors Before You Feed Yourself: I have to remind myself of this every time they call to harass me. I Come first. Granted, one of the steps with the CC Fairy is to restructure my debt to what I can afford, but I’m a few months away from that step.
  • Put the budgeted amount into savings out of the first check every month. If there is overdrawn issues to pay for, it comes out of what should be saved. I never got to the point where I could budget savings. 2012 tweak: Find some money for savings and keep it there.
• Realistic: Pay off what I owe Mom, Dad, and Republic Finance using the debt snowball method by Dec. 31, 2011. *Hysterical laughter* Okay, that’s not really fair. It was doable with more income and more income never materialized. 2012 tweak: I’m working towards taking out a loan with my credit union to pay everyone off with a note I can afford to pay. The CC Fairy is one of the steps I have to work on to make this happen, and one I’m rather gung-ho about because I can’t see the forest for the trees at this point. So far we’ve discussed hypothetically refinancing my mortgage to do this, but if I take that route, I’m getting enough money for a temporary roof too.
• Trackable/Time-based: Update my NetWorthIQ badge and show the progress. Or lack there of. I haven’t updated it since June. 2012 tweak: Update it only a monthly basis.
• Save $1000 emergency fund by March 25, 2011. *Blink* I don’t even know how the math said that was doable. I did set up an ING Direct savings account and have $12.50 out of each paycheck going into it. However I had to raid it twice to try to reach my monthly expenditures. So I’m $944.50 short of the goal as of today. 2012 tweak: Budget in savings. My credit union is also running a savings challenge that I’m looking into. The Balanced Money Formula recommends 20% Savings (which includes retirement accounts, emergency savings, and debt repayment). I would be happy to set aside 10% each paycheck, but I can’t afford it yet.

Take health seriously This is the category that fell into the black hole of can’t-concentrate-on-this-with-bill-stress. Once I have a grocery budget, I’ll be concentrating on this in 2012.

• Specific: Follow Primal guidelines on food and exercise
• Measurable: Weigh every morning
  • Take body measurements once-a-week
• Action-oriented: Exercise every day. Use outside play with Atticus
• Realistic: Lose 4 pounds by next check-up with Dr. Miller
• Trackable/Time-based: Keep a food diary and measurements at FitDay.com
  • Fill out the workout log book every day I exercise and show progress at Joe's Goals

Write 182,500 fictional words between Jan. 1 and Dec. 31, 2011

• Specific: Write at least 500 words every day. I didn’t write every day and it stresses me out to see me not working by quantitative standards. 2012 tweak: Count by projects, not daily word count (unless I’m in a challenge that requires it).
• Measurable: Post the weekly total every Saturday at DUF using the Writertopia progress bar. This year I’ve been fairly good with keeping this updated. 2012 tweak: Continue with this progress.
  • Keep track of daily progress with a marathon spreadsheet. This year I’ve been good at keeping this updated too. 2012 tweak: Maintain this progress.
• Action-oriented: Finish Stellar Gift of Death by March 20, 2011. I’m still writing this story. 2012 tweak: Finish it already!
  • Finish a 5000-word short story for Triangulation submission by March 31, 2011. “Words of Parting” I actually finished and submitted. 2012 tweak: Use the helpful feedback and revise it!
  • Finish steampunk mystery Never started.
  • Finish another story in the Piper of Shadows universeNever started.
  • Finish the "Blue Man on the Porch" Never started. 2012 tweak: All of these projects should be listed under “Specific” and “Action-oriented” should be write every day.
• Realistic: Finish four original stories before any fanfiction. *Snort* I so didn’t follow this 2012 tweak: Write what I want to write. Yes, it would be nice to have a stack of stories to throw at the markets, but if I don’t have the how-will-this-turn-out itch, I drag my feet.
• Trackable/Time-based: Each story has a marathon tracker of its own, and metrics are posted daily at DUF. This has worked out really well. I have remembered to do this, even if I’ve been a few days late on the postings. 2012 tweak: Continue with this progress.

Submit enough stories to get rid of the anxiety over it

• Specific: Submit to six markets by Dec. 31, 2011. I submitted to two markets before I got bogged down with Stellar Gift of Death. 2012 tweak: Submit to three markets, which means I have to get three stories ready for submission.
• Measurable: Find a tracking method that I can update without fuss. Sonar3 is fitting my needs at the present. 2012 tweak: Get some data to put in it.
• Action-oriented: Look for 12 markets. *Snort* Stellar Gift of Death has been quite the distraction from this. 2012 tweak: Do it.
• Realistic: Send out at least one story in February, April, June, August, October, and December. So this wan’t realistic for me at all. 2012 tweak: Base the submission deadlines off the markets I fine.
  • Have conversations with the Fear Monger; it helps. Ole Fear Monger has been distracted from my writing by the debt crisis.
• Trackable/Time-based: Honestly note the anxiety over each submission on tracking method. Sonar3 lets me keep whatever notes I want on each submission. 2012 tweak: This is a valuable tool, so use it!

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The BookWorm

Some Weeks Should Have Warning Labels

Computer, commute, tire--hey, I'm off the C's! Well it deals with the car so maybe I haven't left the C's at all. let's add crying to the list. I spent a good chunk of yesterday's free time in a depressed funk because of what I have to pay out of the next check. Then I spent this morning working on a debt consolidation list on loan paperwork--namely confirming that the totals nearly equal to one of my take-home paychecks each month.

I didn't want to take out another loan to consolidate, namely because I can be the poster girl for "you can't borrow your way out of debt." And there's no guarantee my credit union will give me one, but if they can get the three biggest albatrosses off my neck for a lower amount that can come out of each paycheck, I may get some breathing room. Breathing room especially important since a second job is not happening.

So I did that math and left for the paying job. After commute hell yesterday, the drive in was smooth and I was ahead of schedule, up to the Capitol building. That's where my tire blew. I managed to get into a parking lot near my building. Roadside assistance changed it to the donut so I didn't lose any time, but buying a new tire was not in the budget!



At this point, I am beyond ready for this week to end. And I think my car got jealous that I wasn't planning to spend any money on it beyond gasoline. Right now, it's been half the day and nothing has blown up, maybe I can work on Stellar Gift of Death.

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The BookWorm

What now?

Yesterday was computer, today was the commute. Interstate 12 Open Following Early Morning Wreck. Luckily, I left home late, otherwise I would have been under one of those pipes. But I got caught in the snarl to find an alternative route into Baton Rouge. There's only thee ways to cross the Amite River and also the huge reason why we need the loop project that idiots keep killing, and I was stuck on the north of I-12 side. When I finally reached Magnolia Beach Road and it wasn't moving either, I called in that I was going home.

I had plans of catching up on chores, figuring out my budget for the next paycheck, and writing. Writing didn't happen. Mom co-opted me for a couple of hours, and budgeting the paycheck put me in a funk that was not conductive to fighting with the manuscript. I'll make up for it tomorrow.

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The BookWorm

You Better Believe It's Monday

After months of being used to my paying job's computer being frozen and wiped a certain way, someone decided to "fix" it for me and changed how it wipes. Now all the tabs I had open in Firefox on Friday are gone; Outlook doesn't want to work right because a certain archive file must now be hand deleted; and between programs freezing up on me, trying to find that damn file, and etc. I'm still fucking 30 minutes late getting anything started!

Before I was thirty minutes late waiting for the computer to finish dealing with the other wiping program and saving changes. Aggravating, sure, but at least once it was done, it worked.

IT keeps going through contractors like Kleenex, which doesn't help. I got the new kid, explained what I knew had been done to my machine and what I thought was going wonky now. He did some remote fixes and they didn't stick. We tried it again, and I decided to test it the next time I shut down over the weekend since it took him over an hour to get through it the first time.

Needless to say, most of what little I got done on fiction was rough draft stuff.

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The BookWorm

I'm Crashing Hard Tonight

No more shows running until 10pm so I'll probably crawl into bed at 7 tonight to catch up on the sleep I have missed. Though I can't regret seeing the Christmas episodes of Eureka, Warehouse 13, and Haven.

Other good news, Haven IS getting a season 3!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! The season 2 cliffhanger was downright EVIL, and I really didn't want to stalk the makers for a resolution.

In other geeky news, my confession made it to the Once Upon a Time Confessions Tumblr. If you're not watching it, I can explain my reasoning. But tomorrow after I'm not so droopy.

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The BookWorm

So I'm Officially Second Job-less

So the Public Awareness gig didn't come through and I turned in the demo kit for HDP because I wasn't getting any demos. What's going to happen to my cut to the bone already budget? For starters, I'm ignoring all creditors I can't afford right now. No more letting them guilt me into payments that I can't afford when they want it. All money I can spare will go into the emergency fund because I'm tired of the car breaking down and there's no money to fix it. And family debts move to the front of the line, mostly because I feel the worst about it and if Mom takes up bill collector tactics, I'm screwed.

2012 will either be the year I make writing pay for me and can apply those funds to my personal debt crisis or the Mayan Apocalypse happens and I won't have to worry about it any more. I'm working on the first part.

Onwards happier subject matter, I watched the first half of the Neverland miniseries last night. What I liked:

• Bob Hopskins as Smee: if Disney ever has to rerecord the audio to the animated Peter Pan, Bob Hopskins must play Smee instead of the guy who played the White Rabbit in Alice in Wonderland.
• Captain Bonnie!: "There is no us!" I will be buying the DVD so I can have a reference for her wardrobe. But her character is filled with such SMART piratey goodness, I'll be clapping to bring her back to life. Screw Tinkerbell. She had me at the astronomy lesson.
• Robert Halmi Sr. strikes again: Virgina got wet in The 10th Kingdom, DG got wet in Tin Man, Alice got wet in Alice, and now Peter got wet in Neverland. He's the producer in common on all four, so I'm considering it a scripted Easter Egg.
• Minority casting department: Indians played by Native Americans and given something to do besides be colorful background of exotic Neverland.

What I'm iffy about:

• the Alchemist figured out holograms: well, I don't think it's a factor in part two and it looked cool, so I'll let it slide
• Tinkerbell glows brighter than the other fairies: somebody forgot to tell the CGI department because she looks the same as the rest
• Hook is actually Peter's father: *YAWN* I'm so bored by this trope that the antagonist turns out to be the protagonist's missing parental unit. Why can't Hook be Peter's maternal uncle instead? Or another suitor of Peter's mother who took non-related Peter in for her sake? Do I care enough about the rest to fix this issue with fanfic?
• Peter the Responsible: For ending up as the poster boy for irresponsibility and lousy memory, this Peter is choke full of responsibility for his crew who will be the Lost Boys, for the Indians, for the orb, for Jimmy. Maybe's there's a moral lesson here? Too much responsibility at too young an age will make you crack so you never want to grow up?

If Bonnie wasn't in it, I don't think I would be buying it on DVD or putting it on my to buy list until I have funds.

Added after Part Two: Okay, the second half completely redeemed all the stuff I was iffy about. :D

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The BookWorm