Updating Alt. BM Site State of Progress

Oh bloody hell. Well, if you've gone by the site, you have seen it is still down for maintenance and is looking rather pale.

Now I'm going to try to reconstruct the weekend. Yeah, this is a me pounding my head against the desk post, but hopefully, it'll give me a clear path to start tonight when I get home. If I get home with time or a mood to work on anything; Mondays have been running late at the paying job.

So I reread Drupal instructions on creating a test site until I finally understood them. If there was pay involved, I would seriously consider helping write their technical manuals. I got the database exported and saved to my harddrive. I could not get it imported into the new test database. Did not feel like going around with the server's help desk, so I started working on the test site anyway. It doesn't bother me if there is a policy against database imports, but I couldn't find it anywhere.

A crucial step went wonky somewhere--besides the need a new copy of the database--and I discovered the changes were going onto the live site regardless of the measures I thought I had taken to prevent that. So then it took at least another hour before I get logged in after putting the whole shebang into offline mode. This was so not what I wanted to do. I wanted to have the breathing space of a test site to get most everything right before changing the production site.

So I managed to get the whole thing updated to Drupal version 6.13, turned on the new versions of the modules already in use, turned on new modules I think will help, and created a new Zen theme but didn't make it pretty yet. I really rushed through that whole part too quickly 'cause now I'm facing all the problems and don't know where to really start.

Problem number one: the new modules wrecked the navigation menu. For some reason, the links to get to their admin pages ended up there instead of on the admin page where I've always seen them go before.

Problem number two: I lost some pages made with views and it took a few hours to stumble my way through recreating them in the new Views admin pages.

Problem number three: AcidFree albums are no longer under development. And that means finding a new gallery module. Let's just say that I'm less than thrilled with my first choice at this point. That may change if I hear back from the developer with some clear instructions on how to set things up and make them a little more automatic.

Problem number four: the cron job refuses to run. I haven't even begun to figure that one out yet.

Problem number five: fixing the theme CSS. Actually, I don't see this one being a headache, I just haven't reached it yet.

Any good news? I don't have to retag anything, all the taxonomy terms moved over without breaking. I haven't lost any data and the database appears to be running normally. I think the biggest issue I'm having is a) losing track of what I'm doing because something else that is wrong snags my attention, b) have more patience figuring things out, c) frantic to get it done before the users get disgusted.

This has hammered home the need for a secure test site that won't talk to the production site and change anything for all the Drupal sites I have now. I'm fairly certain I have enough disk space on the external harddrive to set them up, and I should do that while I'm trying to hammer out the changes on Alt. BM Site (that mostly involves waiting on FireFox to unfreeze). It took long enough to work out the kinks with FFGarret and the Circulation Desk; I don't want this snafu to happen again.

Set up a Windows test server using XAMPP
Windows-specific guidelines
Import a MySQL data dump with BigDump
Create a test Site

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Websites are back

The budget is squeaking like a mouse in a trap, but I managed to get the hosting bills paid. Next step is to get the updates finished and set up the Project Wonderful ads. Then I can go back to the creating content and crossing my fingers so nothing breaks while I'm concentrating on other things.

Yeah, I think I can check in on things again in December. After I turn in the Faulkner paper and get a new diploma.

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Funeral done

It was really nice and there was no family drama to end up on the evening news. Yes, I do find that amusing in a dark comedy kind of way that my threshold for a successful family gathering is that low.

The next minefield is what happens to my grandmother now. The biggest issue with deciding anything among the family is best described as herding cats.

Yeah, I'm taking the weekend off for DVD-watching catch-up.

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Papa Gene

Mom just called. We don't have any details, but my paternal step-grandfather has died. It's no big shock since he has been ill for a long time, and we were told on Father's Day it was getting worse.

I only hope his children give us relations-by-marriage enough time to attend the funeral. Gene was our grandfather since Kai was two-years-old and I was five and he was always good to us. Sometimes better than our blood relatives. There's been family squabbles about my grandmother's care since the sitters were supposed to be caring for both of them, but I hope those don't lead to us getting cut out of the funeral arrangements.

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Atticus Golfing

There's a lot of golfing Atticuses on YouTube, but this one is my nephew. :D



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This Doesn't Bode Well For the Rest of the Year

I don't think a single month has started well this entire year. July is no exception. There's no money to renew the BookWorm's Library or Alt. BM Site's hosting. I'm hoping I don't lose everything in the server while waiting on money to become available. Yes, I made backups but I'm not a hundred percent sure the database backup worked for Alt. BM Site.

HOPEFULLY, the budget will work out with the next paycheck and I can pay the bill. Meanwhile, if there was something available for download on my blogs that now doesn't work, send me a message and I'll see if it's not too big to email.

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Number Crunching #157

Actually figured on 12/13/2009

Quicken Cash Flow = -437.20
STEF Total = 5.77

June Budget Meeting

Reconciling Quicken with bank statements: Done.
Reconciling last month’s budget: I didn’t make a budget the month before. $572.00 in bank charges.

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If I'm silent for a while

I managed to slice the tip off my middle finger on my right hand, which really screws with everything I have to do since I'm right-handed. Blogging counts as unnecessary typing, so I'll be back when it doesn't hurt as much.

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Come on Google, the Internet made this possible

Vote to change the Google banner one day to show support to the Iranian people.

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Thinking About Rituals

Namely as explained in this post, how ritual helps your brain cope throughout the day and changing tasks. This shouldn't have to be lectured at me--after all that is why Ritual exists within Wicca. I suck at applying knowledge to daily life.

Undoubtably, one of the reasons I'm at such loose ends at the end of the day is because I haven't been following my GTD and making my weekly lists. But another strong possibility is the lack of ritual before bedtime. What I do now: eat supper while watching Bones on TNT (David Boreanaz in daylight *sigh*), spend an hour or two saying "ACK, I've got so much to do!" and finally go to bed. Not a productive use of time established? Good, moving on.

This isn't about filling every second of every day, but rather stopping myself from having that "ACK!" reaction. Deadlines don't care how drained you feel. And most days of the week, I'm not drained--just lost. So I decided to spend this week being mindful of what goes on in the time frame.

June 16: I decided to mindfully get some work done that I can't do on the paying job computer: building some website graphics. Sit down at the computer with the task firmly in mind. The issue was losing my temper over the computer taking fifteen minutes getting the program up for me to do anything1 I put myself on the timer so I'll remember to get up in move.

Question one: how much of my avoidance dance is not wanting to work and how much is it not wanting to get pissed off at my computer?

Once the computer got over being a sluggard, I got a few graphics done before bedtime. What I noticed besides the meltdown at the beginning: distracted by the TV. I reached the point where I was only working during commercials. Now my TV and computer are in two different rooms, so being distracted physically removes me from the office.

Question two: how necessary is it for me to turn the TV off?

June 17: I got three hours of Bones today, and I still think I missed an episode. (Double checked--I actually didn't, because they didn't give a whole episode to Booth's fake funeral.) When it got to episodes I have seen, I spent more time in the office. And one would think the time for the graphics program to go bugging would be after I had left it running all night and all day, but nope I never had any issues and finished all the website graphics I need at this point.

Since part of the issue is getting pissed at the computer, I think I'm best off turning on whatever the program I need while I'm concentrating on supper and Bones. That way I don't have to sit there and watch it be a sluggard and fume that my precious time and energy is slipping away.

And if the deadline is looming and/or I need to focus, I'm better off saving those projects for the morning or turning off the TV. Right now, the website revamp work I'm doing doesn't take that level of concentration so I don't feel bad for jumping up and watching what unexplained images Ghost Hunters International came up with.

I still have to see how tonight and tomorrow night goes. Now, I have some lunch and maybe go foraging for more food. Needed a bigger salad.

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Nothing in these numbers makes me happy

But at least this graph is easy to understand.

Who's responsible for the debt?

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Year-Round school?

A year round school option that sounds reasonable. I really like the sessions that allow in-depth exploration of a topic.

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Go Iran!

Freedom is a precious, precious thing. It makes things like this possible: The Mouse That Roared

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The O.Z. Map Project

Otherwise known as that thing that drove me crazy for a whole month.

DUF: Tin Man: Pirates Notes 06

Yeah, it's done. Yes, it will be getting its own webpage now that I can work on the update again. :p I hope it's appreciated, but I'm not holding my breath on it getting noticed until I'm ready to start posting Tin Man: Pirates of the Nonestic.

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Finished the Bleeping Map

Lord and Lady, don't ever let me be a glutton for that kind of punishment ever again. And if that doesn't work, at least let me remember to reduce the damn file size so the program stops freezing after every command.

And please, please, please, please, let the final three maps get made smoothly and quickly.

Blessed Be.

Er, okay, for the non-divine readers some background is probably necessary. I read every Oz book I could get my hands on back in the fourth grade (possibly third, it was before I transferred to Springfield's school system and I lived in libraries). I'm fairly certain the collection only had Baum books. So I was really clueless when I found Tin Man fanfics referencing the East - West issue. Did a little research since I needed other countries names for Tin Man: Pirates of the Nonestic and found the answer. Then I got annoyed with Maguire's illustrations for compounding the problem and Tin Man Meta for not looking for the answer. And I needed maps for what I was writing.

So my bright idea while creating my own maps, I would offer copies of the original Maguire maps; the directionally-corrected Maguire maps; a mash-up of all the Maguire maps, which according to me was how Oz looked when Dorothy arrived; a map of Nonestica when Dorothy arrived; a map of modern O.Z. with elements mentioned in the Tin Man miniseries; a map of modern Nonestica, which I needed for my story; and two maps of the principles islands, which are affected in the novel so before and after. Readers deserved something for the rant I had to go with these maps.

I had this brainwave back on May 4th. Finished eight of them rather quickly. Then found hell with the map of the modern O.Z.

I finally finished it last night.

At 11 p.m.

After I had really started on it at 7 p.m. and only had four things to finish on it.

And I should've been finished at 10:30 p.m. only I realized I had forgotten Milltown.

Tonight is an early bedtime. Insanely early bedtime. Before the sun sets bedtime. Which probably means Thursday will be the first day I've felt normal in about two weeks.

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Number Crunching #156

Actually figured 12/13/2009

Quicken Cash Flow = -182.78
STEF Total = 214.77

May Budget Meeting

Reconciling Quicken with bank statements: Done.
Reconciling last month’s budget: I didn’t do a budget the month before. And boy does it show in $642.00 in bank charges.

If April was the month I stopped watching, May was the month where the falling apart happened that I’m still recovering from today.

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Decent writing advice

13 Tips For Actually Getting Some Writing Done and I found it pretty inspiring. I also found her post Quiz: Are You a Moderator or an Abstainer?, equally useful for the health portion of my life.

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The map project just won't die

A three day weekend. One image manipulation project that I just can't seem to finish. So I dedicate one whole day to it. Paint Shop is the only program running, that's the only file open, and when it gets hung up (for whatever reason) I will turn to BMFM: Turbo paper edits. I started at 10:30 a.m.-ish, went to bed at 11:30 p.m.-ish, worked on it more the next day though not exclusively.

And yes, as of today, the stupid thing is STILL not finished. *headdesk*

I'm closer, so much closer to being finished. But I'm also glad that I didn't stop writing the first draft until this map was finished because the text never would have gotten finished. :p

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Once It Looks Pretty, It'll All Be Worth It

I understand how HTML coding works. I understand How CSS stylesheets work. I understand how content management works under Drupal to the point where I can set it up in less than an hour not counting downloading and searching for the modules I want.

What I don't understand is how to make the theme look like I want it to. Or more specifically, I don't know where the conflict is to make it go away.

I don't understand how PHP works. I bought books, read websites, asked questions, but there is something about it that does not connect in my head. Drupal's theme engine (from what I understand out of the Zen's theme building project) works by using the *.info page plus PHP pages to take what has been listed in the CSS stylesheet, and bam! make the Drupal site look customized pretty.

Remembering the pain in the ass time I had hacking into whatever theme I had hacked into while setting up Alt. BM Site, I was sold on this idea. Those hacks have been one of the brakes on updating Alt. BM Site, and anything that could help me build a theme I could just turn off and on or easily correct if I got something ugly on it sounds like a perfect no brainer. Circulation Desk would match the rest of the Library once set up correctly. I could fix things like poll sizes on a CSS stylesheet and watch them take effect site wide for Alt. BM Site without deleting something that allows stories to show up (for example, can you tell I don't trust myself in PHP?) And this is a great example of why theory is always more fun than fact.

So I follow their directions and set up the library desk theme. Then I cracked open the CSS stylesheet and transferred code from the BookWorm's Library. Upload and turned it on, and was greeted by brown as far as the eye can see. Okay, brown is the background color I have lurking under the background image, so that part worked. Where's the image? Dug out the CSS coding tags from HTML Goodies. Oops, I deleted a pair of parenthesis thinking I didn't need them on a style sheet. Added back, saved, uploaded, and refreshed. And still brown as far as the eye can see.

Now I didn't clean out the cache; something I didn't remember until typing this up. SCORE! I just checked it on the work computer and I got the background working. So that's probably the problem at the home computer. Maybe I can get this thing working after all without needing to find someone to do it for me.

Besides that hair pulling, I've been hit with the 'tween-projects-slump also. It's not exactly true, but it still feels weird not to breathing the story in and out all day long. More than once I've had a what should I be doing now moment during the day. It really hit me last night eating supper at a restaurant that was starting to know me as the writing customer. Sure, I could pull out the notebook and start on a new idea, but I have two stories in editing stage plus the website updating. The writing muse can put her feet up for a rest. And that just makes her feel weird.

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Sherlock Holmes

December 25, 2009

This film is either going to be the best or worse Christmas present EVER.

On the surface, I think Robert Downey Jr. is brilliant casting much like he was brilliant casting as Tony Stark. Something that gets uneven treatment in the adaptations (and was censored in the published works too) is Holmes was an addict. If his brain wasn't high from solving a puzzle he resorted to chemical means. The only thing I would worry about would be the accent, but from the trailer, those didn't sound too bad.

Action sequences: Okay, it's hard to tell some times with Doyle's writing style, but there were plenty of times that Holmes took physical action to trap the villain. I don't have my sources right in front of me, but I'm fairly certain that Watson lists boxing and fencing among Holmes strengths. And then there's a great moment in "The Speckled Band" where the villain tries to intimidate Holmes by bending a fireplace poker in front of him. Holmes straightens it out in front of Watson after the villain storms out.

And I have always had a soft spot for Irene Adler and Holmes and the non-canonical continuation of their relationship, which should be anything but platonic or domestic. The trailer raised my eyebrows hopefully for this.

I haven't bumbled around the mystery blogsphere to see what other people or grumbling about yet.

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In the people can be decent department

Back in April, CNN reported that the last Titanic survivor was auctioning off all her memorabilia and selling autographs in order to pay for her nursing home care.

Today the news is that Kate Winslet, Leonardo DiCaprio, and James Cameron have all donated to the fund to help Millvina Dean meet this need.

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Making Plans

I have no idea how I managed to do it, but my back feels like it has been tied up in one giant knot. Or as my massage therapist friend put it, “You’ve got a lot of tension there.” My monthly chiropractic appointment is Thursday, but I may see if I can move it up if it doesn’t improve. The only thing I can think of is that I haven’t been moving enough, with the sit-and-study, sit-and-write, sit-and-manipulate-the-images routine I’ve had lately.

And it took almost all weekend to review projects and plans and try to figure out what will be going on in the next eight months. There’s something really satisfying about being able to make a hole in my Weekly To Do List template. Not that the other things already scheduled on the list won’t fill up that time without me adding anything, but I allowed myself a Zen moment of accomplishment.

I would like to avoid the insane layering of projects if at all possible. Which is why I took so long studying everything. Let’s start by looking at the really backlogged:

• Housework – shouldn’t count as a project but it got out of hand and needs to be wrestled into submission before I make myself sick.
• The BookWorm’s Library – updating is a year past due
• Alt. BM Site – ditto
• FFGarret – time to unveil this and see if I can make it work
• BMFM: Turbo – finish
• BMFM: For Worse – finish
• Tin Man: Dragons and Ninjas – finish
• Tin Man: Pirates of the Nonestic – finish
• Strix – start and eventually finish
• Zy’s Novel – start and eventually finish
• Faulkner paper – finish on the deadline
• Office remodel – have plans so I’m ready when I have money
• Kitchen remodel – have plans so I’m ready when I have money
• Bathroom remodel – have plans so I’m ready when I have money
• Sewing circle – toying with this idea as a way to be social and get things off the project list

And this is just how easily the plans overwhelm me, damn it. It’s all well and good to say “update the website” but that doesn’t cover all the mini-projects that must be done fore I can sign off that it is finished. *Deep breath.* Prioritize. Admittedly, not my strongest affinity.

The BookWorm’s Library – what needs to be finished for me to feel like it’s a real update?

1. Newsletter set up with a new story ready to go including Author’s Notes and soundtrack
2. Edited Author’s Notes with soundtracks uploaded
3. Story mistakes fixed
   • missing flash players added
   • fix McGilla to Magilla in crossover
   • Make sure all the edited Evil Jack stories are uploaded
4. Take down old Writing Tutorials and put up link to FFGarret
5. Forum for feedback
6. Project Wonderful ads

Okay, I think these six things (and believe the idea list is much longer) are doable by the end of the month. Some of them may be already done and I forgot I did them. But let’s not get ahead of myself here; break everything down into Action Steps.

1. New story ready to post: BMFM For Worse is done
2. New story’s Author’s Notes is ready to post: done
3. Soundtrack for new story: already uploaded
4. Newsletter delivery system: need one
5. Newsletter announcement: rough draft written
6. Author’s Notes had soundtracks added to them: done
7. Author’s Notes have been uploaded: no
8. Missing flash players have been added: no
9. Crossover fix has been uploaded: no
10. Edited Evil Jack stories have been uploaded: no
11. Removed old Writing Tutorial section: no
12. Add links to FFGarret: no
13. FFGarret ready to go live: no
14. Forum delivery system: need one
15. Project Wonderful ads created: no
16. Project Wonderful ads have been positioned on pages: no

Lot more listed as “no” than “finished.”

FFGarret: Needs before going live

1. Create ads for Project Wonderful
2. Write first article
3. Write second article
4. Write third article
5. Write fourth article
6. Write fifth article
7. Write and publish an article a week—see if setting up future posts is possible with Drupal

Like dominoes falling into place, sadly almost. There’s a lot to do here, but I think it’s totally doable to make two of these items two Big Rocks for the week. So I’m going to have these projects finished by June 1st before moving to the next one.

That’s the plan as it stands right now. Let’s see how the week turns out.

MA Exam Part 2

I PASSED PART TWO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Unless I get told differently, I should be walking in December, after I finish the Faulkner paper for the Fall semester. So I am one more step closer to the pictured event.



So what does this mean for my writing schedule? I haven't gotten that far yet. Planning out my project schedule will have to wait until I get home and can take an uninterrupted look at the calendar.

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M.A. Exam Part 2

Taken. I actually feel better about how this went than I did the first time I took it, but I won't know anything until they release the results. Which they hope will happen by Thursday. o.O Yeah, I think that's pretty quick.

And on a side note, I think I should pass simply because I got two parking tickets while taking the stupid thing. I'm not arguing that I shouldn't have (cause I was running out of time and said "shit with it" as I parked. Put a parking garage where Lee Hall used to be; if you go taller you could still have grass. :p) But as a karmic balancing thing; it sounds fair.

Or just tell me I failed and let me cheerfully reclaim more of my time from Faulkner's grasp. It's unreal how easy I am to please over this outcome. Now I'm going to take a break and play with maps. I have to go break a continent.

Oh in other details, cause it has been a while since I updated. I did get the home computer up and running. I'm still cleaning out the saved files, because there is only so long I can work on that before getting sick of deleting. Now I need to turn everything off and install a new battery, but I want to be able to turn the computer back on, so I'm leery.

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And it only took four ciritical papers this time

I'm about a third of the way through reading the Beloved critical articles for the M.A. Exam Part 2 next Monday. And I hit my limit, which is sad because I still have eight articles to go.

How do I know I hit my limit? When I have to reach for the dictionary to define words I already know. When I have a cracktastic idea that will not let go.

The cracktastic idea this time: I want someone to go all literary critical theory on one of my fanfics. Take the most extreme Freudian position possible. Or Lacan. Or ... okay I already forgot most of the major movements. Why do I want to see this happen? Because I can remember most of the stuff that churned in my brain, and proving or disproving patriarchal family models based on Oedipal theory was not one of them. The problem of domination was not one of them. Greek tragedy and resisting it wasn't one of them.

If none of them above make any sense to you whatsoever, thank the deity of your choice that you managed to skip literary criticism. But I honestly just want to see it from the other side of the curtain. Because deep down, I think this is all bunk any way when it comes to creation of the works analyzed. I think it has a purpose in helping people understand the work better or perhaps understanding the genre and stereotypes to break away from them. But I'm driven to hair pulling when I find one of these scholar positing so finitely "Morrison was creating an African-American feminist maternal dialogue to combat the white, patriarchal system that oppresses us to this day." You don't know that (but you sure wrote a damn long paper on the subject)! What if Morrison's inspirational thought was just exploring what about slavery would make a mother kill her child, which she has said there was a true case that sparked Sethe, and what if the child comes back as a ghost or something else?

Well, if you do want to psychoanalyze one of my works be prepared for me to laugh hysterically or congratulate you for getting into a character's headspace. Because the only agenda I have is seeing if I can make the plot and theme work and make readers happy.

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Number Crunching #155

Actually figured 12/13/2009

Quicken Cash Flow = 785.23
STEF Total = 214.77

April Budget Meeting

Reconciling Quicken with bank statements: Done.
Reconciling last month’s budget: Not going to try to figure this one out because I didn’t make a budget. I know I didn’t do good because I got $75.00 in Overdraft fees.

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Computer Crash Update

I put in the hard drive and the sound card all by myself, and they worked. Yes, that is an accomplishment for me since I have always been afraid I’d blow it up if I messed with any computer innards. Dad did have to come and help me because I messed up the settings and lost my D hard drive in the process. So I ended up having to install Windows XP twice.

So now I’m currently waiting to get the back up restored from Mozy so I can finish loading up all the programs. I did try just copying the program files that I had saved so I wouldn’t have to reinstall everything again, but Windows XP’s menus didn’t recognize programs that way. So back to reinstalling :p. The new hard drive has a 160 GB, so it should be a long time before I put so much on it, it won’t function. Though I am seriously considering if how I have My Documents set up is the most efficient way to do it. I have 80 GB on the D drive, and I was using that as internal back-up storage and 150 GB on the external hard drive that I wanted to be a backup for things I would have normally burned to a CD but now fear losing forever. The rough idea I have is that XP will continue running really smoothly if all I have on the C drive is it and other program files. I have no idea if that is actually true.

And it is so good to have sound again! But I discovered a hiccup that I haven’t figured out how to solve yet. I saved 5 YouTube fanvids before the soundcard crapped out on me with recovering from the February crash: 4 in a format that runs in QuickTime and 1 with RealPlayer. Despite reinstalling the latest free RealPlayer and seeing that the file is there and nothing appears wrong with it, it refuses to play. The program says it’s playing but the clip indicator doesn’t move, there’s no sound or video. The QuickTime vids play just fine, but the sound is practically non-existent. I have to turn the player’s volume control to max, XP’s volume control to max, and then the speaker’s volume control to max before I can hear a whisper of the music. I had to stop experimenting with it in order to reinstall programs, so I haven’t tested files that I didn’t save from YouTube or if resaving them in a different format would help. I also need to buy a couple of speaker extension cords; I can give myself surround sound now. :D

I spent a few hours rearranging the computer equipment on the desk and tidying up the cords. This is my second attempt to get all the stupid cords off the floor so I can vacuum under my desk without fear of sucking up one of the cords and causing expensive and painful damage. First attempt was with some nice clips that attach to furniture and walls with a sticky back. They open and close easily to allow you get to the cord in question without much hassle. I thought I had put enough of those up to bear the weight, but I figured wrong. All of them had detached from the desk.

While I was wracking my brains to come up with a solution that wouldn’t cost an arm and a leg, I mentioned the problem to my mother. “I use zip ties on your father’s stuff. Otherwise, we couldn’t walk around his desk.”

“That would bundle them together, but not get them off the floor.”

“Then just tack them up.” That’s when she showed me the zip ties she had. Whenever I need to make a bundle, I have a zip-tie machine that can fit around just about any size object and then cuts the plastic tie close so I don’t have any dangly bits. Mom had a package of all the same size ties that you don’t use in the machine, and they also had a built-in loop at one end. I pulled out the horde of cup hooks I ended up with for some reason of another, and hung the bundled wires from the desk with the cup hooks. That took hours to accomplish on Saturday. Plus I installed a new shelf in the bathroom cabinet and my body still hasn’t forgiven me for all the twisting into unusual positions.

Yeah, not a lot of writing or tax work got done this weekend. Which means once I finish reinstalling programs tonight, I have to finish the taxes and send them away. I’m not freaked out about the deadline because I always e-file (and I still have another month before state taxes are due), but this is just bad form. I thought not doing them until March was bad, but this takes the cake. Writing, not even taking longhand notes was simply because I had a computer in pieces and was rearranging the office for updated function (and something new to look at until I can afford my built-in idea) and the living room is still mostly filled with stuff I need to finish dealing with and get rid of. But oddly enough I didn’t need to escape any of it. I’m going to try to get back into the grove today while at work, since I can’t do anything with taxes until I get home.

Next up is replacing the computer’s backup battery, which should probably happen ASAP. After that, I can probably wait a while before getting a DVD burner, new video card, and the Dazzler set-up to burn my VHS tapes to DVDs.

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Computer Crash

The home computer has started the "I can't reboot cycle" again, so I'm breaking down and buying a new hard drive and sound card now. I have to finish my taxes this weekend. But if you're wondering why I've suddenly gone silent, it's because the computer is in pieces.

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The BookWorm

Nothing Like Waking Up on Time

There's also nothing like waking up before the alarm clock to cramps. Unproductive cramps, soon discovered as one stumbled out of the bedroom to the bathroom, takes painkillers, and mutters about the warning system really isn't necessary, crawl back into bed pressing down on stomach to make the pain stop, and then the alarm goes off.

Guess which wake up I have this morning?

though after the Aleve kicked in, I don't have any complaints. I exercises, I finished the Beloved reading hour, and got a crap load of printing done so I can edit BMFM: Turbo.

Verdicts from the meetings: Faulkner paper has to be completely rewritten, but I have a better grasp of where and what to explore. the topic may expand to Faulkner's use of sexuality, which may give me the opportunity to explore other characters I actually like. And we set up actual deadlines I can worked with for a Fall submission and graduation.

If I pass the second shot at the graduate exam on May 4th.

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The BookWorm

Hot Bod Countdown 1

First full week, and I screwed up on Tuesday by oversleeping and missing the workout. But I did get Thursday’s and remembered pushups. I got three of them, full on the floor! And I mean real pushups, not the girly version done on your knees.

Total points possible for 4/4/09 = 154
Total points earned for 4/4/09 = 94

3/25/2009 Starting weight = 199 (doctor’s office scale)
Week 0.5 Avg. Weight = 196.75 (home scale)
Week 1 Avg. Weight = 195.94

So onto the next week’s progress.

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The BookWorm

Number Crunching 154

Quicken Cash Flow = 306.37
STEF Total = 214.77
Amount Available to Spend = 62.91

Enter receipts into Quicken: Done.
Reconcile Quicken to online accounts: Done.
Add totals to spreadsheet: Done.
What did I accomplish during the week? I’ve caught up and stayed on target! I got Number Crunching #153 and #154 wrote and posted on time.
Plans for next week:>

1. Handover the budgeted contributions for Linda’s retirement party


2. Move cap and gown savings to where I can’t spend it.


3. For the love of all that is holy, FINISH DOING TAXES


4. Try out once a month cooking
   • Plan out the meals with what I already have in pantry.
   • Grocery shopping after I get my first paycheck for April.
   • Have to clean kitchen and fridge before I can cook


5. Dispute the overdraft charge on the Demco 4/3/09 payment

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The BookWorm

Number Crunching 153

Quicken Cash Flow = 614.79
STEF Total = 363.69

March Budget Meeting

Reconciling Quicken with bank statements: Done.
Reconciling last month’s budget: Okay, back to acknowledging where I did good and bad.

• Problem categories:
  • Bank charges is the worst because I wasn’t keeping a good enough eye on the balances.
  • Eating Out had way too much money spent in it mainly because I do not want to face my kitchen.


• Did-good-with categories:I don’t see anything that qualifies as “good” spending for the month of March.


• Verdict:Stop giving the bank so much money and restrict how much eating out I’m doing.


• Leftover amount = -35.06

Creating next month’s budget: Done. It’s going to be a tight month as I try to scale to live under my two paychecks.
How much cash can I have: 39.00 and that’s essential shopping and fun money. Planning meals is going to be fun this month.
Automatic payments: Everything has been set up and the bills have been divided into what falls under which paycheck.
Reviewing short-term savings goals: Still trying to reach the STEF goal mark. I ended up having to use a good chunk of what I had put back to plug the hole I had at the beginning of the month, but I’m hoping I can put it back with each paycheck.
Update NetworthIQ statements:

Update NCN Savings Chart:

Overview and plans:

1. Update the Bills List with all current accounts and passwords. Found out that Chase Student Loans, Nationstar, Mozy.com, and Netflix are not on it.


2. Tweak the NetworthIQ Jan. and Feb. statements once I have verified the balances for
   • Sallie Mae
   • Chase Student Loans
   • Republic Finance
   Citifinancial
   • Nationstar Mortgage


3. Change Federal tax withholding amount in Quicken.


4. Handover the budgeted contributions for Linda’s retirement party


5. Move cap and gown savings to where I can’t spend it.


6. For the love of all that is holy, FINISH DOING TAXES


7. Try out cooking for the month

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The BookWorm

Hot Bod Countdown 0.5

This week isn’t a full week, which is why I given this post 0.5 title. The first full week will have three extra days in it.

Thursday’s workout: I did everything but push-ups, because I forgot to do them at 4am.
2 Sun Salutations
30 ab crunches
15 leg raises
Shoulder exercises – 5 lbs. weight
20 Dumbbell rows
40 Hanging arm circles
20 Extended arm circles
20 Dumbbell press
20 Dumbbell flies

Saturday’s workout didn’t happen as fast as I thought it would. I’ll admit I’ve been avoiding my front porch since November and Mom put some of her store furniture on it. Well, my weight set is getting rusty and a bird built a nest in a box of my exercise supplies. So I took measurements to see where I can move the weight bench.



I still have two craft hobbies to go through in the living room, papers I was storing in the back bedroom, and my hurricane supply box. But I can say that the majority of what is staying in there is already in their just needing a few finishing touches (I’m going to hang Captain Kate’s weapons on the walls for example). The measurements work, so now I have to move all of it.




It fits better than I thought it would. Now the bucket of weights ended up in the hall right outside the room, but only because I wanted to be able to walk in the back room.

I figured out my max. weights for lifting and calculated my workout weights.

Hanging arm circles Max weight = 15 lbs, Workout weight = 10 lbs.
Extended arm circles Max. weight = 10 lbs, Workout weight = 5 lbs.
Dumbbell rows Max. weight = 15 lbs, Workout weight = 10 lbs.
Dumbbell flies Max weight = 15 lbs, Workout weight = 10 lbs.
Dumbbell press Max weight = 15 lbs, Workout weight = 10 lbs.
Bench press Max weight = 40 lbs, Workout weight = 30 lbs.
Squats Max weight = 40 lbs, Workout weight = 30 lbs.
Leg extensions = 50 lbs, Workout weight = 37.5 lbs.

Do three sets of ten repetitions. Barbell = 15 lbs. Dumbbell = 5 lbs.

What might be useful is buying two pairs of dumbbells that are already set at 5 lbs. and 10 lbs., because I don’t have enough small weights to make a balanced pair.

Saturday Workout
Bench press = 30 reps.
Hanging arm circles = 30 reps.
Dumbbell rows = 30 reps.
Extended arm circles = 30 reps.
Weight plate press = 30 reps. Instead of wasting time switching the dumbbell weights, I just grabbed a 10 lbs. plate and did the workout with it.
Dumbbell flies = 30 reps.
Leg extensions = 30 reps.
Squats = 30 reps.
Ab crunches = 20 reps.
Leg raises = 20 reps.

And boy do I hurt today. Total points for the four days 52 out of a possible 66, I think that comes out to a C. Not bad for starting, since I came up more positive than I thought I would. I also found out that Fit Day’s freebie account now keeps track of measurements. This is a good thing since the last website I was using to track it died since I started and restarted this whole health odyssey.

3/25/2009 Starting weight = 199 (doctor’s office scale)
Week 0.5 Avg. Weight = 196.75 (home scale)

So onto the next week’s progress.

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The BookWorm

Number Crunching 152

Quicken Cash Flow = 1662.71
STEF Total = 363.69

Enter receipts into Quicken: Done.
Reconcile Quicken to online accounts: Done.
Add totals to spreadsheet: Done.
What did I accomplish during the week? Finances spun out of focus again for an entire month. It’s not an unreasonable schedule, but I hate doing it so much. Do I really prefer the build-up and the guilt that brings? Just when I was asking that, I ran across this in one of the blogs/news I follow.

My sense is when you get discouraged you lose momentum and may slip into patterns of procrastination which also take you farther away from your goal. For some insight on this, I turned to life and executive coach BrianWhetten. Brian shared: "We usually think that procrastination means we're lazy, unmotivated or unworthy. But that's rarely the case. Instead, it usually comes from an over-use of guilt and self-judgment. What do you tell yourself about your study habits? Do your thoughts include things like 'I should be more motivated', 'I have to stop procrastinating' or 'I blew it again'? Thoughts like this cause a burst of guilt and stress. Used on occasion they can push us forward, but when they become a habit, they quickly start to backfire. So instead of trying to "should" your way forward, start by writing down the judgments you've been making against yourself, and then check out www.thework.com as a powerful tool for releasing them." – “Searching For Motivation” by Christine Hassler

My life story feels like one big battle against procrastination, so I can agree I have a habit of trying to lay on the guilt and stress. I don’t want to deal with it, so I ignore it. But I know I’m ignoring it and in comes the guilt.

In an attempt to figure out what was wrong with finances at least, I applied the Feng Shui principle, which basically boils down to “internal life issues are reflected in the external environment at certain points.” The wealth and prosperity point in my house is in the back bedroom and I discovered I couldn’t get into the room because of everything crammed into it. So everything came out, good cleaning, everything got rearranged so I can actually use the space, and I added the weight bench so I have to look at the room at least once a week. And I’m not surprised that I suddenly have the oomph to finish the budget catch-up today. I need to find my health and creativity points next.

Plans for next week:

1. Update the Bills List with all current accounts and passwords. Found out that Chase Student Loans, Nationstar, Mozy.com, and Netflix are not on it.


2. Tweak the NetworthIQ Jan. and Feb. statements once I have verified the balances for
   • Sallie Mae
   • Chase Student Loans
   • Republic Finance
   Citifinancial
   • Nationstar Mortgage


3. Change Federal tax withholding amount in Quicken.

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The BookWorm

Hot Bod Countdown #0

Blood pressure = 109/84 – good
Cholesterol – good
Weight = 199 pounds – creeping up again
Fasting Blood Sugar = 127 – still on the borderline and creeping up

My endocrinologist wanted to put me on Byetta, which involves a very non-complicated injection of the prescription. And my phobia freaked out. “I don’t want you to think I’m forcing this on you,” he said, “I can tell by your face, you don’t like this. But your weight is creeping up and October’s blood sugar was 135 so your body is maintaining it at that level.”

“I haven’t been watching what I eat or exercising. Give me three months to get strict on that and then we’ll see if I need the Byetta.” He agreed so here I am, plotting how I am going to make these changes. The problem isn’t knowing what to do, the problem is doing it consistently enough to make a difference.

Current schedule has me down for exercising three days a week. Current exercise routine I came up with consists of: ab crunches, leg raises, arm exercises to strengthen my left shoulder, push ups, and as many Sun Salutations as I can do. Which would be great if I actually did any of it. Established pattern, moving on.

Let’s change it up a bit. Make Saturday a day to work with weights. I love weight work and I love getting stronger.

Tuesday/Thursday

• ab crunches
• leg raises
• hanging arm circles
• extended arm circles
• dumbbell rows
• dumbbell press
• dumbbell flies
• push-ups
• Sun Salutations

Saturday

• ab crunches
• leg raises
• hanging arm circles
• extended arm circles
• dumbbell rows
• dumbbell press
• dumbbell flies
• bench press
• squats
• leg extensions

Eventually I want to add pull-ups, but I don’t have the equipment or the upper body strength to do them. The equipment issue I might be able to solve fairly quickly if Big Lots still has that bar that fits in a door frame in stock. I like the idea of putting weight work on Saturday, that way I don’t freak out with trying to squeeze correct form before work.

Part Two is diet. Watching carbs and sugar flew out the window months ago—I think about the same time I had a clean kitchen. So now’s probably the best time to take the plunge into Primal Living. I was being lazy and said I’d wait to start when Mark’s book came out, but now I don’t want to have to stick myself even every other day. It’s the perfect time for a clean start.

And I need to dig out the glucose monitor and use it daily. :p But if I’m tracking my weight daily, I need to track my fasting blood sugar too.

How I want to configure Joe’s Goals:

• +2 for all Tuesday/Thursday exercises
• +4 for all Saturday exercises
• -6 if carb intakes is over 20% daily
• +1 for weighing in daily
• -1 for missing daily weigh in
• +1 for measuring fasting glucose daily
• -1 for missing measuring daily fasting glucose

That is a potential 90 points a week.

Current statistics:

• Height = 62.25 in. / 158.1 cm
• Weight = 199 lbs.
• Neck = 38 cm
• Bust = 119.7 cm
• Waist = 104.8 cm
• Hips = 120.6 cm
• Right thigh = 65.2 cm
• Right calf = 40.0 cm
• Right upper arm = 30.9 cm
• Right lower arm = 26.6 cm

My ultimate goal weight is 120 lbs, so I’m 79 pounds above that and 61 pounds above 140 lbs. (a weight I’d be happy to see). Healthy weight loss is about a pound a week, so 80 weeks should see me at 120, 65 weeks should see me at 140. Three months equals 12 weeks equals 12 pounds of weight loss.

Calendar and goal weights:

• 12 weeks = June 21 = 187
• 24 weeks = Sept 13 = 175 lbs
• 36 weeks = Dec 6 = 163 lbs
• 48 weeks = Feb 28, 2010 = 151 lbs
• 60 weeks = May 23 = 139 lbs
• 72 weeks = Aug 15 = 127
• 80 weeks = Oct. 10 = 119 lbs
• 84 weeks = Nov 7 = 115 lbs (I doubt I see that amount of weight loss)

Rewards for meeting goals: My first idea was to pay myself a dollar for each positive goal point I made a week but I don’t think my budge could take a potential $90 a week hit. A better idea is to schedule out the fun stuff I want to do this summer and then assign the points I should have reached by doing everything in order to do it. I really like this idea.

• DragonBall Z = April 8 = 180 points
• Wolverine = May 1 = 450 points
• Star Trek = May 8 = 540 points
• Angels and Demons = May 15 = 630 points
• Terminator: Salvation = May 22 = 720 points
• Land of the Lost = June 5 = 900 points
• Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen = June 24 = 1170 points
• Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince = July 17 = 1440 points
• G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra = August 7 = 1710 points

That gets me through the summer at least. Treating myself to some new clothes and exercise equipment would be nice and I need the clothes, but might be best to tie those treats to pounds loss. I’d hate to buy something and then it not fit.

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The BookWorm

Words epic!FAIL

I finished Battlestar Galactica 45 minutes ago. Still reeling from it. If only one of my projects ever turns out half as epic as that did, I will consider myself blessed.

I do have to add, perfect ending for Tory. Also makes me curious about the other crap she's pulled in the 2000 years. Galen wasn't buying her moves when she first tried them, and then his laugh when Anders revealed they had been an item.

And I can't participate by listening to anyone's discussion because the computer still has no sound. I haven't tested that out fully, but the theory I'm leaning toward is I need a new soundcard. So now I'm off to play with TiddlyWiki some more as I start to wind down from the high.

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The BookWorm

Number Crunching 151

Quicken Cash Flow = 1209.58
STEF Total = 1220.69

Enter receipts into Quicken: Done.
Reconcile Quicken to online accounts: Done.
Add totals to spreadsheet: Done.
What did I accomplish during the week? Nothing with finances.
Plans for next week:

• Need to change Federal tax withholding amount in Quicken.

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The BookWorm

MA Exam Part 1

I'm done, spent, wrung out. Faulkner is getting shelved and it'll be another decade before I crack open one of his books for pleasure reading. If anyone mentions Flowers in the Attic to me, I'll probably start blabbing about Sutpen and Quentin and Horace. No, I did not mention V.C. Andrews in my paper. I really kept it on a scholarly level. I just hope it is scholarly enough.

If I start sobbing in my cubicle, it's because my advisor told me it's not done and I have to do more. I'm waiting for his approval before the final, final turn in. And I will be lighting every candle in my house tonight and praying to every academic god I can find reference to that I pass and don't have to deal with Faulkner any more.

Next thing to figure out is how to read all the material for Part 2 of the MA Exam and stay sane.

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The BookWorm

Another Never-ending Cycle: Faulkner's Use of the Incest Taboo

Progress Bar from Writertopia

Number Crunching 150

Quicken Cash Flow = 576.61
STEF Total = 306.20

Enter receipts into Quicken: Done.
Reconcile Quicken to online accounts: Done.
Add totals to spreadsheet: Done.
What did I accomplish during the week? Nothing with finances.
Plans for next week:

• Need to change Federal tax withholding amount in Quicken.

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The BookWorm

Oops I got tagged

Well, in other news, I moved Merrilee's blog in Bloglines where I won't skip reading it for days on end.

The problem I have with memes and answering memes is they make me so self-conscious. I don't hide much, how can it possibly be interesting, I've complained about everything to everyone who reads the blog or as a blog post--what don't they know? Sometimes they just feel way too close to the chain emails to list all your favorites. I really avoid those. But I'm going to make a valiant effort to list seven unknown things about me, frankly because I felt guilty about missing it for so long.

1. I just tried to kill myself with the numerator stamp falling from the shelf above my head. All because time change has messed with my sleep and I get clumsy when I want a nap.

2. I have played so many tabletop RPGs I normally think of goofs like that in terms of "I failed my dexterity roll."

3. I'm writing this post instead of my paper that my Master's depends on. My only defense: I tried to write at work and my coworkers are distracting. They are not nearly as distracting for the fiction, so my conclusion is that I want to write the fiction and I am able to concentrate more on blocking them out. Instead of spending all my energy battling the ennui of that writing project. I like my intro so far, the idea feels pretty solid, I don't know if I will find outside sources, I just don't care about passing the damn thing.

4. I started doing fanmixes! Give me some comments on those, nobody else has seemed to notice them.

5. I went back to school because I had a fit of the grasses is greener on the other side. Now I wish I had at least picked a subject that wasn't so subjective. Accounting would've been a good choice, and work would have paid for some of it.

6. I made a word count goal for myself this year that I have yet to tally up any words for it. I have tallies, elsewhere, but I haven't filled out that big one for all the fiction I have wrote.

7. I had to start writing that paper in committee. Yes, I actually wrote down what the other voices inside my head were saying as I tried to make sense of the project. Now I feel like I have earned a pic badge I saw on someone's LiveJournal: "Writing: socially acceptable form of schizophrenia." I'll worry about the development if the voices tell me to go kill people or commit blood sacrifices.

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The BookWorm

Fanboy wailing, oh that's what that sound is

Shortpacked: The Worst Jobs in Hollywood

Come on, if you've seen Watchmen, you know that comic is so very true.

I guess I'll start there since it is just the most recent. Wow. Speechless, breathless, wonderful wow. Casting was superb, and it visually looks like Snyder has developed a way to keep the comic tone and iconic images without shooting a staged story panel. Though I found out my stomach appreciates the violence a little less realistic. Or in other words, I'm happy with breaking bones as long as they don't break through skin with blood. During the prison riot, I was actually glad to see some of the crooks decide to stay in the cells. I agree with a lot of the dumb criminals stereotypes, but come on they do have a healthy sense of self-preservation. And they kept all the favorite lines: "I'm not locked in here with you; you're locked in here with me!" "I'm used to going out at 3am and doing something stupid." And I am so going to buy the soundtrack. Whoever put that together was brilliant.

Now the rest of the post probably contains spoilers, though I'll try not to give too much away.

And yes, they changed the ending. I know for some fanboys (using the derogatory meaning of the term) that is the ultimate sin, but I think the movie ending made even more sense than the book. One: we don't have time in the movie to set up all the secondary characters and investigations that something big and bad is going to happen and cover our five main characters dealing with the death of the Comedian.

Two: The movie ending gives an extra wrinkle of foolproof-ness to Adrian's plan. Dr. Manhattan being the unpredictable wildcard has to be neutralized. If killing him didn't work, turning the entire world against him sounds like a reasonable alternative to me. Even if he hadn't decided to go play god in another part of the universe, he wouldn't have been able to stop Adrian publicly ever again.

Three: The theme didn't change. Nothing ever changes, human nature is what makes the world a rotten place, and all Adrian has probably accomplished is a delay is all still present. Though I wish they had kept in Dr. Manhattan telling him that and then leaving the atom bomb cloud in his globe as he departs. But I'm not so crazy to demand that my favorite panel must be in a film in order to call it good.

Coraline is drop-dead gorgeous and if you can stand to see it in 3D, it's used to give depth to the world and not so much thrusting things in your face. And the story is wonderful. I love Neil Gaiman's stuff for the simple fact that he layers in stuff that most people without a Liberal Arts degree wouldn't understand but if you do get it, it just adds another layer of texture to the world. And if it does go past your head, you really don't have to know it to get the story. Also, I think that movie is one of the few times I have felt justified in wanting to call Social Services on behalf of a fictional child.

Street Fighter: The Legend of Chun-Li: what the hell happened to this movie in development? I'm putting all the blame on the writers, directors, and possible whoever was in charge of editing it. Yeah, there will be spoilers in this part.

Problem one: YOU KILLED BISON! You put in a cute little ad and a nod to go find Ryu next, but you killed off Bison. You put Charlie Nash in the movie (and yes, someone else had to remind me of the significance of that character) and you let him live and killed off Bison! I haven't decided if I should give out brownie points for making it the most hard-core Neal McDonough on-screen death or not.

Problem two: I can accept using a video game as the place to get characters and build the story up from there. But with the genre of the game and the movie, your audience is expecting fights. And then when you set up fights between two characters from the video game, we expect to see some major ass-whumping. The Vega/Chun-Li fight is an epic fail in this regard. And the only reason I can't see it getting more time is because of problem number three.

Problem three: The B-plot with Charlie Nash and the Bangkok cop; why the hell was that even in the movie? Seriously, we get cheated on Vega fight because you need to make a joke about gold handcuffs? All those scenes should have hit the cutting room floor leaving the storage container scene and maybe some of the so unhelpful guns at the end. And Nash should have died. I mean DUDE, you just let a seventeen-year-old girl see her father get killed brutally and didn't even try to turn her aside when you saw what was going to happen!

I totally want Rose to snap and go evil just because of that alone. Either that or Bison invested in cloning research. And Nash should have died.

Problem four: I'm not hating Neal for the Irish accent, he said repeatedly in interviews "they" wanted Bison to have an Irish accent, so he came up with a backstory reason for it. Epic fail on directing there. I figured based on the interview reasons that it was mostly leftover from his parents and then reinforced when he went back to Ireland. Parents died when Bison was infant; any accent should have been Bangkok-ish since he never left until in his late teens or early twenties! Yes, you do pick up local twang (some people more easily than others) but being back in Bangkok should have been bringing that out in his voice.

Yeah, they made the first Street Fighter movie look Oscar worthy. Ponder that one.

And of course I had to go fix it. You know how Clue gives you three endings. Well this is the ending I think they left out.

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The BookWorm

Number Crunching 149

Number Crunching 149
03/06/2009

Quicken Cash Flow = -61.14
STEF Total = 306.20

Enter receipts into Quicken: Done.
Reconcile Quicken to online accounts: Done.
Add totals to spreadsheet: Done.
What did I accomplish during the week? Not much with finances.

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The BookWorm

Number Crunching 148

Quicken Cash Flow = 402.29
STEF Total = 306.20

February Budget Meeting

Reconciling Quicken with bank statements: Done.
Reconciling last month’s budget: Again I’m not bothering with my categories this month. I’ll probably pick that back up again in March.
Leftover amount = -1.38
Creating next month’s budget: Done.
How much cash can I have: Didn’t figure that out.
Automatic payments: Everything was paid and next month’s payments are set up.
Reviewing short-term savings goals: Still trying to get the STEF.
Update NetworthIQ statements:

Update NCN Savings Chart:

Overview and plans:

1. Update the Bills List with all current accounts and passwords. Found out that Chase Student Loans, Nationstar, Mozy.com, and Netflix are not on it.


2. Tweak the NetworthIQ statement once I have verified the balances for
   • Sallie Mae
   • Chase Student Loans
   • Republic Finance
   Citifinancial
   • Nationstar Mortgage

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The BookWorm

Life's latest hiccup

Saturday Feb 21st, my harddrive crashed. I had already implemented automatic backups, so the only data I lost was the graphic files I had been working on that morning. I had to reformat and reinstall Windows. Thanks for that birthday present. :p

As of today, my birthday, I have downloaded all my data files from Mozy.com and off the D drive. Unfortunately, I never considered saving all the program files so I still have to reinstall all my programs. I'm trying to cut that list down and I'm also trying to find the data files I don't have to have on the harddrive. I had previously cleaned out My Pictures and My Podcasts, now it's time to be ruthless on some other folders.

Unfortunately, since I don't have the programs available to me, I haven't been doing everything I need to do like finances and the Faulkner paper. I hoping to at least reinstall one program to make a dent in those piles tonight.

Yeah, I think I'm going ahead and buying the external harddrive soonish instead of trying to hold it back for a reward. Apparently I need more storage space.

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The BookWorm

Okay, I'm so over feeling like this

I passed out Saturday giving blood for lab work, and I really haven't felt right since. I really want to tell Murphy to stop fucking with my health/body. I hate needles and syringes. I come from a family of diabetics and have to keep my blood monitored. The strong veins in my elbows have decided to play hide 'n seek with the nurses, so now the blood has to be drawn out of my hand which hurts worse and bruises so I can't even wear a watch. And to top it all off now I have a history of passing out so I have to do all this laying down now.

Not happy with that scenario at all, no.

Faulkner idea: His ideas of past not even past and how that correlates with incest as a theme and a cycle to repeat.

I have so got to come to grips with this. 15 to 20 pages final product, so let's build a 10 page paper out of just my ideas on this topic before scrambling for the outside sources.

Course everything would be better if I hadn't decided to take a holiday this weekend. Yes, all the fun stuff I haven't missed about school is coming forth: making me feel guilty and resentful when I'm not subscribing to the Puritan work ethic. Even right now, I'm feeling guilty because I'm not working on something else!

Wise Self: *Pulls hair* Just quit that already! I'm so tired of being my personal bad guy. What is the worse that can happen?

I don't graduate and get proved as a big fat failure.

Wise Self: How likely is that to happen?

Very if I don't finish the projects. Very even if I do finish the projects.

Wise Self: Now why is that?

Eer... because I'm a stupid fat failure. Right, lousy excuse. I'd rather work on fiction. hell, I'd rather wash dishes than deal with Faulkner.

Wise Self: You know, every time you get into a state of dreading something, it never turns out as bad as you thought it would be.

I know, I know. i don't know why I'm fighting this so hard.

Wise Self: Because when you fear failure, you deliberately self-sabotage your way to failure.

Stop sounding so smug about it.

Wise Self: Sorry, but you know what you have to do.

Stop avoiding Faulkner. have it be the first thing I do in the morning and last thing I do at night.

Wise Self: Yes, that's probably for the best. It'll turn out well. And since you came to your senses so quickly, finish the soundtrack art tonight. You have three left to do, you can finish them in an hour since you don't need to hunt for parts of images any more. Finish early and you can probably find a thesis statement before bedtime.

That took a peculiar turn, but a productive one. I'll have to remember that technique.

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The BookWorm

Because I need to remember this!

1) Hold onto the things that make life fun for you. Don’t let yourself get so immersed in your work that you give up your hobbies. Force them into your schedule. If you’re just staring at a computer getting nothing done, get up and do something completely unproductive that you love!

2) Make time for relationships. I’m really blessed that I actually like my in-laws, so spending a week with them was great. It helped me ask what was missing from my life. If you’re spending whole days on your own or just with your partner/family, you need to get out. Try to do something with people other than the ones you live with at least once a week.

3) Talk yourself through the guilt you’re feeling. I found cognitive behavioral therapy a real life-saver when I was depressed. I still use some of the concepts, like writing down why I feel guilty. I was able to see that I felt guilty because I worried that if I didn’t work all the time we wouldn’t have any money and I would never be successful. Came up with a whole list of fears. So then I’d write lists of facts, like that our income was greater than our expenses. And that I wrote better posts when I’d spent time away from the computer. And that since I didn’t have a billion clients, I didn’t have 24/7 work available anyway.

4) Leave things alone. I learned that my blog doesn’t stop getting visitors even if I don’t have a new post every day. I don’t even have to login and neurotically make sure the plugins are all up-to-date, etc. I don’t have to leave comments if I don’t have the time and energy. Don’t leave them alone forever, of course, but be aware that the world doesn’t stop running when you step away from the computer…which is good.

Realities of Freelancing: You Set Your Own Hours - by MrsMicha

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Conquering Procrastination

*Snort* I meant to start this post yesterday. Yeah, the patheticness of that is not lost on me, thanks.

So strategy to conquer the procrastination? Do I even have one? Can I even implement one?

I’ve gotten really good at making my weekly to do list, and recognizing what Big Rocks and everyday chores need to be done. The problem is I’ll still leave it on the list for weeks not doing it. Scolding myself is ineffective and nagging guilt sends me running to something that doesn’t make me feel guilty. Which just keeps the procrastination ongoing.

I will admit to piling too much on my plate. I just counted up eighteen things that qualify as Big Rocks on this week’s to do list, but only six are identified as Big Rocks. Frell. So how come whenever the “too much to do ack! Runaway!” is tripped, it doesn’t alert the rest of my consciousness? A memo would be nice.

Okay, so let’s by shuffling the to do list. From an older copy of the file I had on the flash drive no less. Now on my current printout, correctly identify all Big Rocks. Next step is to make a space big enough on the sheet to hold them all. Now I need to tweak the format so it will print out on one sheet.

That done, and now the Big Rocks don’t seem to be panic inducing. I still have too much on the list, but all in one spot instead of scattered on different days gives me the illusion of control at least. I’ll take it. So now that they are in one spot, what is wrong that I keep not doing them?

Finances: 7
Planning reviews: 3
Writing: 3
Exercise and Health: 3
School: 2

Why is it finances that seem to be the big honking one I don’t do? I obviously need to move some of those to the Master List of Finance Projects to get to later.

In less serious news, I finally have enough money to complete the set of plastic stackable drawers of doom for my home office, Sterlite quit making them. I even checked their website. Which totally sucks because I already have four and have not found a replacement style that stacks with those four for the other seven I want.

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The BookWorm

Crap, a whole new month

I never intend to go missing or stop doing things or just plain procrastinate what is on the list to do. I don’t know how to make it stop or rather how to stop doing it.

Today has been fun. While practicing cover-my-own-ass, I ended up bringing down some heat on other people. Totally unexpected consequences but I’m unrepentant about my first response and how high up it went. I actually wasn’t yelling to get moved to the front of the line, but yelling because the procedure is broken and needs to be fixed.

Continuing on this theme: February 7, 2009

I have so avoided anything at SLU for going onto a second month. I’ve been reading, but haven’t found anything to write on! And it’s making me feel very panicky. That makes me want to dive headfirst into fiction and not come out. I’m actually compromising on that feeling with this post.

Problems with Faulkner: I think it stems between the difference between a critic and a writer. A critic studies literature for theme and with the literary theory readings (seen through Freud, New Criticism, Feminism, etc.). A writer studies literature to figure out how can I do what the author does to use in my writing. There’s some overlap, but overall two very different outcomes. I’m a writer being forced into producing criticism.

Yes, I had classes on this, and I still took the stance of a writer/detective fan and how the character did not work for me. I even quoted Van Dine’s rules. Then I get into the whole loop thinking of how can I produce anything on Faulkner that the pros haven’t done better? I should have sucked up my dislike of the other professor and worked on the Dante paper instead. I should have seen if I could’ve restarted a fiction thesis this semester! *Sigh* Too late now.

Looking at my schedule. I have two hours open now, but I can’t completely avoid the fiction. I NEED fiction. So I’m stealing away at least fifteen minutes on fiction, as a keeping me from going crazy. I hope this works.

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The BookWorm

Number Crunching 147

Quicken Cash Flow = 1162.81
STEF Total = 306.20

January Budget Meeting

Reconciling Quicken with bank statements: Done.
Reconciling last month’s budget: Is finally done, but I’m not proud of it. I ended up borrowing more money from Republic Finance to pay off my overdue auto insurance and to keep from losing the coverage. I’m not even going into the problem and did-good-with categories for this month.
Leftover amount = 844.16
Creating next month’s budget: Done.
How much cash can I have: Didn’t figure that out.
Automatic payments: Everything paid and everything is set up.
Reviewing short-term savings goals: Still trying to reach the STEF total.
Update NetworthIQ statements:

Update NCN Savings Chart:

Overview and plans:

1. Update the Bills List with all current accounts and passwords. Found out that Chase Student Loans, Nationstar, Mozy.com, and Netflix are not on it.
2. Tweak the NetworthIQ statement once I have verified the balances for
   • Sallie Mae
   • Chase Student Loans
   • Republic Finance
   • Citifinancial

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Number Crunching 146

Quicken Cash Flow = 447.97
STEF Total = 436.20

Enter receipts into Quicken: Done.

Reconcile Quicken to online accounts: Done.

Add totals to spreadsheet: Done.

What did I accomplish during the week?

• Downloaded TurboTax – 2009’s payment due Nov. 1st = 59.95
• Had to check with Nationstar again because their letters for the past due amount were sent before I made the payment plans. I got the letters and freaked out that they had canceled the payment plan. Everything is still set up.
• I can’t figure out what went wrong with the Graphic Smash payment. Voided that payment.
• Checked out Helium.com. It’s a site that pays for writing, unfortunately not for fiction which they also accept. So now I have a choice to make about how to sell my nonfiction.
• Cleaned up the harddrive’s Budget folder. Much easier to find the files I need now.

Your Money or Your Life Exercise: Just guess.

Plans for next week:

• Figure out how to pay off Liberty Mutual past due.
• Do taxes with Turbo Tax.
• Set up ING Direct savings account with $183.50 at the least. That amount equals one month of the STEF goal total.
• Join Walgreens Easy Savers program.
• File paperwork in binder.
• Clean out binder of 2008 data. (I think I may have already but I can’t remember if I did.)

This is how easy updating the budget should be, providing I clean out the inbox every day and don’t let the stuff pile up.

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The BookWorm

I’ve Got Typing to Catch Up On

I never mean to fall behind. Often time, can’t be helped. But I am tired of all my energy going to playing catch-up. I haven’t figured out quite how to balance it yet.

Sporadic news: I feel officially old now—I’ve had my first slip in a shower. I managed to come down on my left thigh across the bathtub wall. The bruise is so deep, there is still no discoloration on my skin even though I’m going on day five since. And all because I was trying not to get my hair wet.

The Dark Knight on an IMAX screen – I wish those seats would come with seat belts. Course, the scenes that induce the falling sensation the most are right at the beginning.

Movies to see: Coraline, Inkheart

Funny thought related to movies: To the makers of My Bloody Valentine 3D, your horror story must suck if all you’re advertising is the 3D shock effect. Hint: go research a movie called the Tingler and see how well the shock effect worked for them.

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Number Crunching 145

Quicken Cash Flow = 570.31
STEF Total = 446.20

Enter receipts into Quicken: Done.

Reconcile Quicken to online accounts: Done.

Add totals to spreadsheet: Done.

What did I accomplish during the week? I called Nationstar and not only did they get my payments, I also set up a new payment schedule to get current with my past due amounts. I also need to remember that I have to call the April payment in myself.

I also found a bad flaw with the financial planning I had done for the month: forgetting to pull out gas and grocery money when figuring out with which paycheck to pay for which bills. So I made the following list to help me remember what still needs to be paid next check.

It doesn’t look like they stopped doing subscriptions at Graphic Smash, but that my payment didn’t go through for some odd reason. I’ll have to research that more.

Bills that must be paid by Jan. 30th paycheck:

• Nationstar Mortgage = 494.30
• Savings for Driver’s License renewal = 7.17
• Citifinancial = 137.98
• Republic Finance = 99.00
• Chase Student Loan Servicing = 35.91
• Atmos Energy = 61.04

Your Money or Your Life Exercise: Nope, still ignoring it. For shame really, since I do like the book so much.

Plans for next week:

• Check with Nationstar Mortgage and make sure they have received payments.
• Check with Liberty Mutual if payments have been received.
• Download TurboTax software.
• Set up ING Direct savings account.
• Check with Graphic Smash and see if they have canceled subscriptions
• heck in with Paypal as to why the subscription didn’t go through
• Join Walgreens Easy Saver program

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The BookWorm

Inbox Freakout

What’s the easiest way to give myself a the-inbox-will-never-empty panic attack? Put a thick book in there that only needs to be shelved, pile papers on it, and forget it’s in there. Stack gets closer to the basket’s top and cue the freakout. The task I’ve been avoiding like an office plague took about twenty minutes this morning to empty.

Headlights got fixed Sunday.

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The BookWorm

Writing Goals for 2009

Cherie Priest had a post (I’m slowly catching up on my blog reading) in which she had gave her final fiction tally for 2008, which was under her goal amount, and she also said how she reached said goal amount. 1000 words a day times 365 days = 356,000 words for the year. Totally doable goal for a year, so I’m borrowing it for 2009. I just have to remember that only fiction counts.

So let me do some math. 32,923 words written as of December 31st. Add that to 365,000 and I get 397,923 as the number I plug into the marathon tracker. Having technical difficulties setting that up, moving on.

Projects! There’s so much bouncing in my head, in my notebooks, in my computer that wants to get done! This is where my Writing Project list comes in so handy. I already have so much on it, I don’t need to go looking for something in the idea folder. Maybe that should be a goal for 2010—pull an idea out of the idea folder.

First Draft Finished
Biker Mice From Mars: Wars Are Won By Those Who Dare: Turbo
Biker Mice From Mars: Evil Jack: For Worse

Finish with Publication or Submission
Tin Man: Dragons and Ninjas

Write
Tin Man: Pirates of the Nonestic
Strix

Boy, do I still have stuff listed after that, but I don’t want to over plan. Seriously, if over planning is my weakness, I’d much rather wake up in June and say “I finished all that; what’s next?” Plus there’s the nonfiction to consider too. Bloody nonfiction getting in my way. ‘Dems the breaks, cherie. (And I have no idea why Gambit suddenly sprouted in my head.)

Besides with the epic tale Tin Man: Pirates of the Nonestic is shaping to be, I’ll probably kill my word count on it and whatever Strix shapes into.

Now off to be responsible and cook food and finish reading so I can get on with more responsible things.

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The BookWorm

Number Crunching 144

Quicken Cash Flow = 725.67
STEF Total = 571.20

Enter receipts into Quicken: Done.

Reconcile Quicken to online accounts: Done.

Add totals to spreadsheet: Done.

What did I accomplish during the week? Not much of anything financial. Well, unless you want to count overspending the grocery budget.

Your Money or Your Life Exercise: Nope, still haven’t gotten to it.

Plans for next week:>

• Check with Nationstar Mortgage and make sure they have received payments.
• Check with Liberty Mutual if payments have been received.
• Download TurboTax software.
• Set up ING Direct savings account.

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The BookWorm

Trying a New Idea

Actually a couple of ideas, so bare with me while I detail them.

A). Melatonin is helping me wake up on time. I’m guessing my body really wants to go diurnal, and has no desire to get up if it’s not daylight yet. I’ve woken up better on the two days I took melatonin than on the days I haven’t. I’m also going to get a multi-vitamin that has a healthy dose of vitamin D, since I have to waste all my daylight hours out of the sun.

B). Cooking two breakfast meals and 4 entrée meals is the right balance to get me through the week. Point being I must get everything cooked on Sunday. I lucked into this realization after way too much over-thinking it. Winn-Dixie had a meat special on some cuts of beef, chicken, and pork, and I stockpiled. So then I got some fresh veggies on sale—salad mixes and squash and Brussels sprouts—and decided to cook four different meats since I already had salmon in the freezer. I pulled out South Beach Diet recipes I wanted to try, and then managed to get six days of different lunches and supper out of them. And most recipes made enough servings I could freeze one for later.

The one drawback I found was I didn’t quite have enough Tupperware to single meal portion out everything. Next week, I’ll make sure I have my lunches and breakfasts for work portioned out first because the supper and home lunches will be okay in a larger container. I will also have to ration off some dessert too, since I already ate all the Jello sugar-free pudding.

C). Alternating reading hours for the writing hour. This one really hurts my heart. But the truth is I’m starting to ignore what else I must get done in favor of my semi-created world. I can squeeze in the writing at the paying job; I don’t squeeze in the research reading nearly as well.

D). Paying myself for reading. Yeah, I’m going to bribe myself. Fifteen minutes earns $0.25. As of Nov. 24th, I’ve only earned $11.75. I’d love to get enough on the reading to pay for an external harddrive. (I learned the shelf life of burned CDs and DVDs isn’t as long as I thought and now I’m petrified I’ll lose all my story data. An external harddrive is the first step in dealing with that fear. I need $55, so I have $43.25 to go. *Crossing fingers that it’s doable by third paycheck this month*

If this experiment is successful, I may start bribing myself for purchases I want to make with other chores I hate. After all, I want a DVD burner for the computer and then the set up so I can transfer my VHS tapes to DVDs. I want a dishwasher. I want a Victorian faucet that must be one of the most expensive faucets in the world for my bathtub.

That’s it on life changing ideas. This weekend will probably have me tied to the chair doing all the reading I have been avoiding. I have a few big rocks I still need to accomplish this week, and sadly, it took until Friday before I felt I could do anything.

2009 Movies

Okay, John Scalzi has given me heads up for some things I hadn't heard of in the chute.

I also want to add Underworld: Rise of the Lycans and Street Fighter: The Legend of Chun Li. I have no problems with fun B-grade material. Hell, I liked the Van Damme Street Fighter; it manages to pull EVERY CHARACTER from the game and by the end of the film they are all in the game costumes and do their victory pose (at least the good guys do). Mortal Kombat's sequel tried to do the same thing and failed miserably. I like Mortal Kombat, but when Christopher Lambert doesn't show up for the sequel, you need to be worried. I only got through the mess because the lead actor was cute and I kept waiting for them to reveal the dead Johnny Cage up and fighting (like he does in the game). Johnny Cage stayed dead. Mortal Kombat's sequel I don't own on DVD.

http://blogs.amctv.com/scifi-scanner/2009/01/2009-scifi-movie-predictions.php

Now, will I have money for all this fun time? I hope so.

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The BookWorm

What Makes Tuesdays So Hard

I got up yesterday full of energy and mostly ran on time. Got to work on time, despite finding out that both my headlights had burned out (drove with the brights on which still worked and hated every minute of it. I apologize to everyone’s whose eyes I hurt). I started feeling sluggard throughout the work day, but I got through telling myself I needed to make my stops, cook dinner, and early bedtime. I broke down and bought dried pineapple at Wal-Mart, and the sugar rush got me home.

Got home too late to change the headlight lams and felt completely unmotivated to do anything. Cooked the ginger chicken with stir-fried veggies, but only ate a couple of bites. Went to bed at 9:30pm and then had a fit trying to fall sleep. That took anywhere from thirty minutes to an hour; I didn’t watch the clock.

The end result being I was only able to pull myself out of bed with enough time to get dressed, get lunch, and cook supper since I won’t have energy tonight to cook. I even washed dishes while I was waiting on the oven. It was like a cascading pattern of lateness. Which leads me to my question, why is Tuesday so hard? What makes it so hard? It’s supposed to be Monday. The whole world stereotypes Monday as the worst day of the week.

Today, I’ve drunk less caffeine—just in case that was it. I can go straight home and nuke supper—no stops to make. I’ll be sure to eat a handful of nuts before I walk out the door for my homeward commute. And hopefully, I’ll get home with time to do headlights.

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The BookWorm

New Year, Same Old, Same Old

So the inbox, weekly planning sessions, action steps were all supposed to help me be more productive. And I'm sure they do work, if I actually got them done. This is the year for not insanely heaping more onto my plate and then going crazy when it doesn't get done. This is also the year for not skipping meals on the weekend and then wondering why I feel like shit by nightfall.

I'm skipping the resolutions; they don't work. Instead I think I'm going to have improvement milestones. Mainly because a year is an insane cutoff date for the goals, and hopefully so I don't feel bad with the fall down and get back up routine.

Improvement Milestone #1: Finish Baby Step #1 and start on baby Step #2 by Dec. 31st, 2009.
Improvement Milestone #2: Graduate by May 2009.
Improvement Milestone #3: Have successfully turned all my school energy to another project--probably writing related--by Dec. 31st, 2009.
Improvement Milestone #4: Fit into size 12s by Dec. 31st, 2009.

Nothing too extreme there I hope. All able to ease right on into my life.

Daily schedule: There are nine things that should be done each and every day. Well, they aren't, so something needs to give. Exercise and general straightening don't need to happen every day, but need to happen more than once a week, so I'm going to alternate them. Three days of exercise and four days of general straightening so the place doesn't look like a dump. I'd love to let washing dishes go officially but it already happens unofficially enough.

Here's to slowly creating a saner schedule.

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The BookWorm

Number Crunching 143

Quicken Cash Flow = 632.59
STEF Total = 271.20

Enter receipts into Quicken: Done.

Reconcile Quicken to online accounts: Done.

Add totals to spreadsheet: Done.

What did I accomplish during the week? My mortgage was sold by GMAC to Nationstar. Here’s to hoping I have a good relationship with this new company.

Your Money or Your Life Exercise: Still been too busy to get back started on this.

Plans for next week:

• Check with Nationstar Mortgage and make sure they have received payments.
• Check with Liberty Mutual if payments have been received.
• Download TurboTax software.
• Set up ING Direct savings account.

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The BookWorm